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Cooking For Guys

Cookbook for a bachelor's kitchen

Cooking For Guys thanks to Howard Chapman

Meal recipe for a bachelor: (A) simple, (b) quick, and (C) lots of it

QuotaBills
That guy is a blackbuster. - Archie Bunker

Come to the dark side. We have cookies. - Unknown

Life is better with fresh baked cookies. - Unknown

Life is short. Eat cookies for breakfast. - Unknown

Then you add two forkfuls of cooking oil. - The French Chef

Recipe for a happy husband: Fake and Bake. - Unknown

Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is. - Jimmy Durante

Some guys play hockey. Gretzky plays 40-mph chess. - Lowell Cohn

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once. - Phyllis Diller

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

In some areas I am more noted for reading then I am for cookies. - Wally Amos

As a kid, I got three meals a day. Oatmeal, miss-a-meal and no meal. - Mr. T

If ever a chef were to cook a fly, he would keep the breast for himself. - Poland Proverb

Jerry Ford is a nice guy, but he played too much football with his helmet off. - Lyndon Baines Johnson

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

We can learn much from wise words, little from wisecracks, and less from wise guys. - William Arthur Ward

Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein. - Joe Thiesmann

The rich take life one financial year at a time. The poor take life one meal at a time. - Mokokoma Mokhonoana

I have a constant sweet tooth, so I like anything from the bakery, like cupcakes, cookies. - Carmen Electra

This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two. - George Burns

It used to be that when all else failed, a guy went into the army; now he becomes a consultant. - Blackie Sherrod

My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves. - Rodney Dangerfield

Show me a guy who's afraid to look bad, and I'll show you a guy you can beat every time. - Lou Brock

Somehow a bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever. - Helen Rowland

I want the pilot flying me up in the air at 30,000 feet to make more than a guy working at Taco Bell. - Michael Moore

I don't think I've ever been to an appointment in my life where I wanted the other guy to show up. - George Costanza

All guys are scared of each other, didn't you know that? I'm not the only one. We're all born afraid. - Cornell Woolrich

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron

Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about myself. It's kinda like being the guy on a date. - Caroline Rhea

Politics is the only business where doing nothing other than making the other guy look bad is an acceptable outcome. - Mark Warner

I love spaghetti. And I like to cook spaghetti. And I used to eat it every day. I weighed thirty pounds more than I do now. - Christopher Walken

For my last meal, I'd want an Irish breakfast with soda bread and one of my dad's omelettes with three or four eggs. - Erin O'Connor

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

Whenever I have a spare second, I'm in the kitchen whipping up a batch of cookies. I make a mean batch of chocolate chippers. - Karlie Kloss

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to hell? - Homer Simpson

The remarkable thing about my mother is that for 30 years she served us nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found. - Calvin Trillin

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman - it depends on how much happiness you can handle. - George Burns

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright


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Made His Bed

Dog Sled

Only In Canada - Nosey Moose

Camper Tank

Plane Pushers

Wise Electricity Use

Critter Control

Redneck Ice Fishing

Skeletons In The Closet

Captive Audience Twins

Brew Table

Nailed It Baby

Water Supply

Holding His Own Portraits

Hawaii Scuba Bus

Chicken Pie

Computer Challenged

Swiss Reaper

Original Play Station

Haunted Pancakes