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Cooking For Guys

Cookbook for a bachelor's kitchen

Cooking For Guys thanks to Howard Chapman

Meal recipe for a bachelor: (A) simple, (b) quick, and (C) lots of it

QuotaBills
Life is short. Eat cookies for breakfast. - Unknown

Recipe for a happy husband: Fake and Bake. - Unknown

Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is. - Jimmy Durante

Some guys play hockey. Gretzky plays 40-mph chess. - Lowell Cohn

I wouldn't trade you for all the cookies in the world. - Cookie Monster

A crude meal, no doubt, but the best of all sauces is hunger. - Edward Abbey

A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of. - Jane Austen

A bachelor is one who enjoys the chase but does not eat the game. - Unknown

Cooking certain dishes, like roast pork, reminds me of my mother. - Maya Angelou

I suppose I could have stayed home and baked cookies and had teas. - Hillary Clinton

I'm a guy who can't function well in life, but I can in art. - Woody Allen

Someone has to stand up and speak for the freedoms of the little guy. - Christopher Monckton

I know the guy who writes all those bumper stickers. He hates New York. - Steven Wright

Opera: where a guy gets stabbed in the back, and instead of dying, he sings. - Robert Benchley

My weak spot is laziness. Oh, I have a lot of weak spots: cookies, croissants. - Anthony Hopkins

Here's a last bequest: I don't want that guy sayin' my last urology. - Archie Bunker

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

In hotel rooms I worry. I can't be the only guy who sits on the furniture naked. - Jonathan Katz

Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein. - Joe Thiesmann

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

If I get married again, I want a guy there with a drum to do rim shots during the vows. - Sam Kinison

The guy went into the Capitol under the dome and was sellin' the teapots on the side. - Archie Bunker

I have a constant sweet tooth, so I like anything from the bakery, like cupcakes, cookies. - Carmen Electra

If you meet someone who can cook and do housework, don't hesitate a minute - marry him! - Rita Rudner

This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two. - George Burns

Show me a guy who's afraid to look bad, and I'll show you a guy you can beat every time. - Lou Brock

Somehow a bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever. - Helen Rowland

I know I'm not sexy. When I put my underwear on I can hear the Fruit-of-the-Loom guys giggling. - Rodney Dangerfield

I played golf. I didn't get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. That's way more satisfying. - Mitch Hedberg

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

The house smelled musty and damp, and a little sweet, as if it were haunted by the ghosts of long-dead cookies. - Neil Gaiman

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron

The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it possible to cook indoors with charcoal and outdoors with gas. - Bill Vaughan

The guy who takes a chance, who walks the line between the known and unknown, who is unafraid of failure, will succeed. - Gordon Parks

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

For my last meal, I'd want an Irish breakfast with soda bread and one of my dad's omelettes with three or four eggs. - Erin O'Connor

The best cookies of all in the world are the ones my daughter Sally makes. They come out all uniform with nice little air holes. - Willard Scott

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make. - Unknown


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