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Happy Mother's Day

Kids are even more special on Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Celebrating Mom's special day with something white

QuotaBills
Mother Superiority - Archie Bunker

Necessity is the mother of attraction. - Luke McKissack

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover! - Homer Simpson

A rich child often sits in a poor mother's lap. - Danish Proverb

Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother. - Oprah Winfrey

You're not famous until my mother has heard of you. - Jay Leno

Air pollution is turning Mother Nature prematurely gray. - Irv Kupcinet

My wife was too beautiful for words, but not for arguments. - John Barrymore

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

A husband's conjungal and a wife's convivial obligation - Archie Bunker

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

Behind every successful man is a woman.
Behind her is his wife. - Groucho Marx

Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert

My wife and I are getting remarried. Our divorce didn't work out. - Rodney Dangerfield

New mother - they get a sense of waddya call, "the maternals." - Archie Bunker

My honeymoon night was spent on the floor in the bathroom with my mother. - Ronnie Spector

Now, as always, the most automated appliance in a household is the mother. - Beverly Jones

My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it. - Mark Twain

I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her. - Rodney Dangerfield

My best friend ran away with my wife. And let me tell you, I really miss him. - Henny Youngman

When my wife asked me to start a garden the first thing I dug up was an excuse. - Henny Youngman

My mother is Irish, my father is black and Venezuelan, and me - I'm tan, I guess. - Mariah Carey

I not only think we tamper with Mother Nature, I think that Mother Nature wants us to. - Willard Gatlin

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby

I just wasn't cut out to be a Chinese Tiger Mom. I'm more of an Irish Setter Dad. - P.J. O'Rourke

My perspective on my mother has changed immensely. She was a lot taller when I was younger. - Howie Mandel

You don't have to deserve your mother's love. You have to deserve your father's. - Robert Frost

A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing. - Joey Adams

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

My mother always told me I wouldn't amount to anything because I procrastinate. I said, Just wait. - Judy Tenuta

Drunk Man: "I can't bear fools."
Dorothy Parker: "Apparently your mother could." - Dorothy Parker

Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home. - Rodney Dangerfield

I tell ya, my wife and I, we don't think alike. She donates money to the homeless, and I donate money to the topless. - Rodney Dangerfield

I like to do things for my wife on Valentine's Day. I open the door for her when she puts laundry in the washing machine. - Milton Berle

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry

One disadvantage of being a hog is that at any moment some blundering fool may try to make a silk purse out of your wife's ear. - J.B. Morton

The rhythm of the footsteps, the sound of whatever is coming down the ladder is driving both me and my mom steadily toward peeing our pants. - Kendare Blake

Love as powerful as your mother's for you leaves its own mark ... to have been loved so deeply ... will give us some protection forever. - J K Rowling

I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity. - Eleanor Roosevelt

When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child. - Sophia Loren


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Rock Watcher

We Call It Lake

Single Men For Long-Term Commitment

Sitting Just Off Center

Dentist Bowling

Maybe Shame Will Stop Her

Penalty Shot

Puppy Taco

On The Edge

Laptop Cooler

Bruce Lee Coffee

Stealth Cat

Fish Hawg

Bee Beard

Titanic Trailer

Porsche Bird Droppings

Foosball Maze

Brain Logic

Kickback - England

Preschool Parking

Look Daddy - Baby Kittens!

Big Ambitions