#1 humor site on the 'net

Ice Cream Clouds

Reaching for a scoop of vanilla weather

Ice Cream Clouds thanks to Louise Harper

White cloud formations in the sky

QuotaBills
Women hold up half the sky. - Mao Zedong

The sky already fell. Now what? - Steven Wright

If the sky falls, hold up your hands. - Spanish proverb

Knock on the sky and listen to the sound. - Zen Saying

You bring your own weather to the picnic. - Harlan Coben

I started out as a gaseous cloud. Then I cooled. - Jack Nicholson

An end is in sight to the severe weather shortage. - Ian Macaskill

The sky is the limit only for those who aren't afraid to fly. - Bob Bello

It is best to read the weather forecasts before we pray for rain. - Mark Twain

In Texas it's always hot, dry, sunny, not a cloud in the sky. - Piper Perabo

This is perfect weather for today's game. Not a breath of air. - Curt Gowdy

Life is too short to eat vanilla ice cream and dance with boring men. - Unknown

Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it. - Charles Dudley Warner

Conversation about the weather is the last refuge of the unimaginative. - Oscar Wilde

Work and pray, live on hay, you'll get pie in the sky when you die. - Joe Hill

If you want to make everyone happy, don't be a leader. Sell ice cream. - Steve Jobs

Thank God men cannot as yet fly and lay waste the sky as well as the earth. - Henry David Thoreau

Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine. - Anthony J. D'Angelo

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

Marriage is very difficult. It's like a 5,000-piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky. - Cathy Ladman

It is only in sorrow bad weather masters us; in joy we face the storm and defy it. - Amelia Barr

I don't make plans, because life is short and unpredictable - much like the weather. - Al Roker

I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining. - Groucho Marx

Let's get an extended weather forecast from a jittery, inconsistent, reddish brown rodent. - Unknown

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

I think the genetics of being Irish are that you sort of prefer when it's rainy and cloudy. - Kate Flannery

Caesar dreamed that he was flying above the clouds, and now that he was clasping the hand of Jupiter. - Suetonius

The visions are fragmented and a dark cloud spreads like spilt ink across the pages of possible futures. - Garth Nix

Be careful not to complain about anything, even the weather, since I am the Author of your circumstances. - Sarah Young

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain. - Robert Frost

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

That black cloud is coming from the direction the wind is blowing, now the wind is coming from where the black cloud is. - Ray Illingworth

They invented the three-day bank holiday weekend because you can't lump all the bad weather into just Saturday and Sunday. - Unknown

A cloudy day or a little sunshine have as great an influence on many constitutions as the most recent blessings or misfortunes. - Joseph Addison

Don't knock the weather. Nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while. - Kin Hubbard

The trouble with weather forecasting is that it's right too often for us to ignore it, and wrong too often for us to rely on it. - Patrick Young

My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy your ice cream while it's on your plate - that's my philosophy. - Thornton Wilder

Never design your character like a garden where anyone can walk. Design your character like the sky where everyone's desire is to reach. - Unknown

Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind. - Leonardo da Vinci

This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet. - Rumi


Frozen Fish Meal

Stork Exhaust

I 'Saw' An Accident

Protractor Cook

Street Genius

Rebar Walker

No Worries

Road To Success

Politician Training

Math in Africa

Customers Wanted

Sock Storage

Hung Out To Dry

Need More Horsepower?

Japanese Diving Platform

Water Taxi

Wrench Family

How To Burn Fat

Ghetto Boat

Car Surgeon

Just Blew It

His Dent

Cheat of the Year

Divorce Defined