#1 humor site on the 'net

Mom Lookout

Looking after each other

Mom Lookout thanks to Mike King

QuotaBills
Mother Superiority - Archie Bunker

By ancestry, I was born to rule. - Nelson Mandela

Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw

Friends are the family you choose. - Jennifer Aniston

Something bad has befelt the family. - Archie Bunker

Ignorance is the mother of admiration. - George Chapman

You live as long as you are remembered. - Russian Proverb

My parents put a live teddy bear in my crib. - Woody Allen

Jesus was a Jew, yes, but only on his mother's side. - Archie Bunker

Anybody can make history, only a great man can write it. - Oscar Wilde

The two things children wear out are clothes and parents. - Unknown

I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage. - Erma Bombeck

Food, love, mother and career: the four basic guilt groups. - Cathy Guisewite

I'm super laid back. I'm from Texas. I love my family. - Selena Gomez

Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert

My religious background is that my mother is a Christian Dior Scientist. - Robin Williams

My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it. - Mark Twain

There's no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one. - Jill Churchill

A mother's arms are made of tenderness and children sleep soundly in them. - Victor Hugo

Those who inherit fortunes are often more troublesome than those who make them. - African Saying

People will not look forward to posterity who never look backward to their ancestors. - Edmund Burke

When we are planning for posterity, we ought to remember that virtue is not hereditary. - Thomas Paine

My mother-in-law has so many wrinkles, when she smiles she looks like a Venetian blind. - Les Dawson

You don't have to deserve your mother's love. You have to deserve your father's. - Robert Frost

Said the daughter: "I don't have to help my Mom with the housework. She knows how." - Unknown

The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient, whilst Mother Nature takes care of the cure. - Voltaire

It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding. - Erma Bombeck

A man who thinks too much about his ancestors is like a potato - the best part of him is underground. - Henry Cooper

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

My mother always used to say, "The older you get, the better you get. Unless you're a banana." - Betty White

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

I was born in Canada for a reason. It was because my parents wanted me to have the freedoms that this country offers. - Patrick Chan

Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one. - Jane Howard

Our ancestors are very good kind of folks; but they are the last people I should choose to have a visiting acquaintance with. - Richard B. Sheridan

Worrying is less work than doing something to fix the worry. Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom with the dishes. - P.J. O'Rourke

The greatest thing about man is his ability to transcend himself, his ancestry and his environment and to become what he dreams of being. - Tully C. Knoles

In a big family the first child is kind of like the first pancake. If it's not perfect, that's okay, there are a lot more coming along. - Antonin Scalia

I can't help detesting my relations. I suppose it comes from the fact that none of us can stand other people having the same faults as ourselves. - Oscar Wilde

Chutzpa is that quality enshrined in a man who, having killed his mother and father, throws himself on the mercy of the court because he is an orphan. - Leo Rosten


Alaska Gas

Definition Of A Good Friend

Redneck Car Repair

Self-Propelled Rocket

Pole Clock

Donut Holes

Insect Food Fight

Living At C Level

Little Johnny Bath

Emergency Stops Only

Portable Balance Beam

Fried Eggs - Military Style

Motorvation

Teenage Mutant Ninja Hay Bail

Driving Rain

Eddie Reward

Got Them All

Owlvis Presley

Motorcycle Limo

Runaway Tree

Human Explosion

Air Force Pilots

See You Later

Lunch Admirers