#1 humor site on the 'net

Mow Your Lawn

How to lose pets in your neighbourhood

Mow Your Lawn thanks to Keith Blake

Beware of backyard safety concerns

QuotaBills
As welcome as a skunk at a lawn party. - Proverb

A lawn is nature under totalitarian rule. - Michael Pollan

A cat bitten once by a snake dreads even rope. - Arab Proverb

Big sisters are the crab grass in the lawn of life. - Charles M. Schulz

It's hotter than a snake's ass in a wagon rut. - Robin Williams

If Adam and Eve were alive today, they would probably sue the snake. - Bern Williams

I always thought a yard was three feet, then I started mowing the lawn. - C.E. Cowman

The key to a healthy lawn is to take care of what happens below ground. - Mike Bechtle

If dandelions were hard to grow, they would be most welcome on any lawn. - Andrew V. Mason

When the snake is in the house, one need not discuss the matter at length. - African Saying

If you see a snake, just kill it - don't appoint a committee on snakes. - H. Ross Perot

Books are no different from goats - they enjoy an afternoon out on the lawn. - Kate Bernheimer

My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance. - Tim Allen

I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy. - WC Fields

There's one good thing about snow: it makes your lawn look as nice as your neighbor's. - Clyde Moore

A good wife is one who can mow the lawn in the summer and put up the storm windows in the winter. - WC Fields

I spend hours mowing the lawn in absolutely straight lines on my tractor. If it's not right, I do it again. - Britt Ekland

The bulletin board on the lawn of a New Jersey Church reads "We reserve the right to accept everybody." - John Kazmark

A perfect summer day is when the sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, the birds are singing, and the lawn mower is broken. - James Dent

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor


Lunch Admirers

Loo View

Cell Phone Booth

Topless Kate Middleton

Skype Hype

Almost Batman

Cadillac Bike

Donut Decadence

Manmade Beach in Japan

Bacon Bikes

Animal Taxi

Lego Key Holder

Mechanic Apprentice

Redneck Helicopter

Hairy Egg

Fork Door Handle

Making Hockey More Popular

Suitcase WorkPlace

One-Knight Stands

Stealth Cell Phone Tower

Holes of the World

Sunken Bed

Australian Wildfire Survivor

Rat Toys