#1 humor site on the 'net

Nose Hair? She needs a Barb-hair

She used a strong-scented conditioner that day

Nose Hair? She needs a Barb-hair thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Was she looking for a Bob haircut?

QuotaBills
Never ask the barber if you need a haircut. - Warren Buffet

Even the worst haircut eventually grows out. - Lisa Kogan

A hair on the head is worth two on the brush. - Oliver Herford

Lead the audience by the nose to the thought. - Laurence Olivier

He doesn't dye his hair, he bleaches his face. - Johnny Carson

There is nothing so difficult to marry as a large nose. - Oscar Wilde

I feel old when I see mousse in my opponent's hair. - Andre Aggassi

Every day People straighten up the hair, why not the heart? - Ernesto Guevara

Let the wind blow through your hair while you still have some. - Dave Weinbaum

I have so much hair, I have a separate wig closet in my house. - Sherri Shepherd

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out my nose. - Woody Allen

I don't consider myself bald. I'm simply taller than my hair. - Tom Sharp

I have little hair because my brain is so big it pushes the hair out. - Silvio Berlusconi

The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library? - Lily Tomlin

Sometimes it's the people you can't help who inspire you the most. - Melinda Gates

The whiter my hair becomes, the more ready people are to believe what I say. - Bertrand Russell

Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush. - Phyllis Diller

Always hold your head up, but be careful to keep your nose at a friendly level. - Max L. Forman

Use your imagination not to scare yourself to death but to inspire yourself to life. - Adele Brookman

A celebrity is anyone who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair. - Steve Martin

I'm not Irish. Just because I have red hair doesn't mean I'm a lucky charm. - Rebecca Mader

A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom when he can no longer be led by the nose. - Mark Twain

I get more distracted by hair or a really bad wig than I do costumes any day of the week. - Colleen Atwood

For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. - Johnny Carson

Whether you're a man or not comes from your heart, not how much hair you have on your head. - Bruce Willis

Do I have a large frog in my hair? I'm worried about the sensation of my brain being eaten. - Joaquin Phoenix

Let hope inspire you, but let not idealism blind you. Don't look back, you can never look back. - Don Henley

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader. - John Quincy Adams

Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair. - Khalil Gibran

I benefit from the Mr. Potato Head syndrome. Put a wig and a nose and glasses on me, and I disappear. - Phil Hartman

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

Laundry's easier when you live alone. Fifteen minutes before a date, put 'em on, dry 'em with a hair blower. - Elayne Boosler

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. - Sam Ewing

As a travel writer I've specialized in gritty, fearful destinations, the kind of places that make a reader's hair stick on end. - Tahir Shah

You know, sometimes I feel well and vital in the world, and sometimes I just feel so distressed I want to pull my hair out by the roots. - Sharon Stone

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. - Garrison Keillor

His mind is concrete and fastidious,
His nose is remarkably big;
His visage is more or less hideous,
His beard it resembles a wig. - Edward Lear

That is what we are, what we do: nose a net, push push, a net that never exists. The knots in the mesh as strong as our own believing. Our own fears. - Peter Heller

When I was six, I entered a talent contest. I dyed my hair blond, had a chainsaw and pretended I was Eminem. The old folk weren't expecting that. - Nico Mirallegro


Back-lash

Find 11 Faces

Redneck Electric Pool

Hokey Pokey Addict

Tired Of Snow

Moving Dot Illusion

Lehman Brothers Protest

Crowd Surfing - Expert Level

Pipeline Protesters

Live Long Street

Car Trolley Transportation

Gone To The Dogs

Inside Outside Thinking

German Efficiency

Cutting Trees Above Powerlines

Perfect Pizza

Fridge Support

Moose Pedestrian

Two Foot Steaks

Venice on a Shoestring Budget

German Forest

Late Package Delivery

Simple Surgery

Mega Samurai Puzzles E