#1 humor site on the 'net

Painted Fence

Doing his best to clean up the neighbourhood

Painted Fence thanks to Roy Taylor

How to partially paint a wooden fence

To paint or stain a fence
QuotaBills
I want to paint the way a bird sings. - Claude Monet

Keep the paint up, and the rubber down. - Unknown

Every time I paint a portrait I lose a friend. - John Singer Sargent

A brush of kindness can paint a smile on a face. - Robert M. Hensel

If I could say it in words there would be no reason to paint. - Edward Hopper

The only fence against the world is a thorough knowledge of it. - John Locke

Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up. - Robert Frost

It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it. - Steven Wright

You should not paint the chair, but only what someone has felt about it. - Edvard Munch

Any fool can paint a picture, but it takes a wise man to be able to sell it. - Samuel Butler

Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can. - Danny Kaye

Anytime you see a turtle up on top of a fence post, you know he had some help. - Alex Haley

As a child, I always chose a false nose and some face paint and a wig for my birthday. - Ashley Jensen

Winning depends on where you put your priorities. It's usually best to put them over the fence. - Jason Giambi

A woman's dress should be like a barbed-wire fence: serving its purpose without obstructing the view. - Sophia Loren

The minute there's a map, there is no art. Paint by numbers is not art. Paint by numbers is a mechanical activity. - Seth Godin

If you hear a voice within you say "you cannot paint," then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced. - Vincent Van Gogh

If there be a God, I think that what he would like me to do is paint as much of the map of Africa British red as possible. - Cecil Rhodes

I challenge you to make your life the masterpiece you want to paint, the novel you want to read, the day you want to wake to. - Toni Sorenson

Deals are my art form. Other people paint beautifully on canvas or write wonderful poetry. I like making deals, preferably big deals. - Donald Trump

It was any outcast's nightmare. If I looked carefully, I suspected I might find it beneath the black paint of the small acrylic by the window. - Nancy Werlin

I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included. - Steven Wright


Tired Flagpole

Coffee Steps

Royal Flush

Swallow Swallow

Bronx School Bus

Gay Dog

Lead Sled Dog

Copy Paste

Designer Shoes

1954 Prom Queen

Marshmallow Crop

'Do Not Read' Sign

Don't Ever Give Up

Amsterdam House Poles

Puzzle Makers

Baseball Slugger

Bear Print

Neck Exercises to do at the Computer

Geek Coffin

Sidewalk Jammies

Nature Calls

Son's Sun Protector

Something Wong

Camping For Seniors