Pigging Out in El Paso

Bacon is meat candy. - Unknown

Texas is as odd as it is vast. - Henry Rollins

Bacon is duct tape for the kitchen. - Unknown

Bacon, The source of all happiness. - Samuel V.D. Evans

Either you like bacon or you're wrong. - Unknown

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? - George Carlin

I actually get quite sad when I smell bacon. - Jane Velez-Mitchell

Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman

Life is too short not to order the bacon dessert. - George Takei

You want people to think you live in a pig's eye? - Archie Bunker

Texas is a hotbed of insanely good bands and musicians. - Henry Rollins

I love super crispy, almost burned, snapping-crispy bacon. - David Lynch

Look a pig in its eyes, and understand the truth behind bacon. - Mango Wodzak

In Texas it's always hot, dry, sunny, not a cloud in the sky. - Piper Perabo

Even apocalypse looks less dire when viewed over a plate of bacon. - Stephanie Stamm

If you call ham "Canadian bacon", what do you call bacon? - Michael Kelso

Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. - George Carlin

Bacon's not the only thing that's cured by hanging from a string. - Hugh Kingsmill

You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans. - George Carlin

We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas. - Red Skelton

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. - Ambrose Bierce

How can you look at the Texas legislature and still believe in intelligent design? - Kinky Friedman

I'm so ugly I worked in a pet shop, and people kept asking how big I'd get. - Rodney Dangerfield

Thank God I've got eyebrows like bacon, because I've always got egg on my face. - Jarod Kintz

Don't ever wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, but the pig will enjoy it. - Cale Yarborough

Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon. - Doug Larson

If a man's from Texas, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him by asking? - John Gunther

Most of my memories of Texas are of mosquitoes, watermelons, crickets, and my brother teasing me. - Robin Wright

Every day, thousands of innocent plants are killed by vegetarians. Help end the violence. Eat bacon. - Unknown

I blend my green drink every morning. I also fix my son a full-on American breakfast with bacon and toast. - Liz Phair

I'm never gonna get used to the 31st century. Caffeinated bacon? Baconated grapefruit? Admiral Crunch? - Fry

You can take the girl out of Texas but not the Texas out of the girl and ultimately not the girl out of Texas. - Janine Turner

Bank of America is to sweetheart loans and Democratic Party payoffs as Paula Deen is to sugar and bacon grease. - Michelle Malkin

Special day! Oh, what have I forgotten now? Now, don't panic. Is it Bacon Day? No, that’s crazy talk! - Homer

The pig is not just pork chops and bacon and ham to us. The pig is a co-laborer in this great land-healing ministry. - Joel Salatin

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

You pretty much can't get away from bacon or whiskey in the South. Put a doughnut in it and you'd be good to go. - Hillary Scott

Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze