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Russian Car Pool

I bear-ly made it in to work today!

Russian Car Pool thanks to Roy Bishop

Leaving food in cars is not very safe

QuotaBills
Support the right to arm bears. - Unknown

I can't win. Love is Russian Roulette for me. - Freddie Mercury

I bear no grudges. I have a mind that retains nothing. - Bette Midler

The secret of politics? Make a good treaty with Russia. - Otto von Bismarck

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

There is no income tax in Russia. But there's no income. - Will Rogers

The measure of a man is the way he bears up under misfortune. - Plutarch

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

In Russia, if a male athlete loses he becomes a female athlete. - Yakov Smirnoff

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

You wanna talk that Russian talk, take yourself back over to the USSO. - Archie Bunker

In America you can always find a party. In Russia the party always finds you. - Yakov Smirnoff

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

Bulls and bears aren't responsible for as many stock losses as bum steers. - Olin Miller

It's not the bulls or the bears you need to avoid, it's the bum steers. - Chuck Hillis

If you don't know how great this country is, I know someone who does; Russia. - Robert Frost

I've had a lot of luck. If I didn't I'd be washing bottles in Russia. - Marat Safin

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

The Iron Curtain may be a thing of the past, but Mother Russia is as mysterious as ever. - Robert Gottlieb

Many agree that the worst thing that could ever happen is if Russia and China get closer. - Donald Trump

They say you only go around once, but with a muscle car you can go around two or three times. - Tim Allen

I think Kazan is Russia's sportiest city after Moscow, leaving all the others far behind. - Marat Safin

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

The ideal man bears the accidents of life with dignity and grace, making the best of circumstances. - Aristotle

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

I took a speed reading course and read "War and Peace" in twenty minutes. It involves Russia. - Woody Allen

For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

Many people are surprised to hear that we have comedians in Russia, but they are there. They are dead, but they are there. - Yakov Smirnoff

When we save the rain forest, the polar bear, and Al Gore, we should party so hard that Canada calls the cops on us for noise. - Paula Poundstone

Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list. - Yakov Smirnoff


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