#1 humor site on the 'net

Side-Ways

It'll fit if I turn it sideways, right?

Side-Ways thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Might be a good idea to read Road Safety Signs before it's too late

QuotaBills
The height of cleverness is to conceal it. - Duc de la Rochefoucauld

Care shouldn't start in the emergency room. - James Douglas

My weight is perfect for my height - which varies. - Unknown

Never invest emergency savings in the stock market. - Suze Orman

I failed to make the chess team because of my height. - Woody Allen

Happiness makes up in height for what it lacks in length. - Robert Frost

Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. - Ambrose Bierce

A man's true height is determined by his thoughts and actions. - Unknown

I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can reach. - Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. - Natalie Goldberg

Great is the height I must scale, but the prospect of glory gives me strength. - Propertius

There is nothing so strong or safe in an emergency of life as the simple truth. - Charles Dickens

A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom when he can no longer be led by the nose. - Mark Twain

If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room. - David Lehman

One of the tests of leadership is the ability to recognize a problem before it becomes an emergency. - Arnold H. Glasow

Never measure the height of a mountain, until you have reached the top. Then you will see how low it was. - Dag Hammarskjold

Faith is a fine invention
When Gentlemen can see -
But Microscopes are prudent
In an Emergency. - Emily Dickinson

I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting. - Ronald Reagan

The best way to meet a woman is in an emergency situation - if you're in a shipwreck, or you find yourself behind enemy lines, or in a flood. - Mark Helprin


Pirate Vacation

How Not To Prop Start Your Plane

Redneck Spaghetti

Wild Game Nutrition Guide

Alaska Gas

Definition Of A Good Friend

Redneck Car Repair

Self-Propelled Rocket

Pole Clock

Donut Holes

Insect Food Fight

Living At C Level

Little Johnny Bath

Emergency Stops Only

Portable Balance Beam

Fried Eggs - Military Style

Motorvation

Teenage Mutant Ninja Hay Bail

Driving Rain

Eddie Reward

Got Them All

Owlvis Presley

Motorcycle Limo

Runaway Tree