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Something Witty

A brewhouse that hires thought-provoking employees

Something Witty thanks to Barry McCartney

Business was slow at the bar that day

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I thought Europe was a country. - Kellie Pickler

Logic is the anatomy of thought. - Albert Einstein

Wit is the epitaph of an emotion. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Words are the small change of thought. - Jules Renard

To be thought rich is as good as to be rich. - William M Thackeray

A public-opinion poll is no substitute for thought. - Warren Buffet

There can be no wise politics without thought beforehand. - Annie Besant

A wise man will live as much within his wit as his income. - Philip Dormer Stanhope

A witty statesman said you might prove anything by figures. - Thomas Carlyle

How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign? - George Carlin

The wit knows that his place is at the tail of a procession. - Mark Twain

A facility for quotation covers the absence of original thought. - Dorothy L. Sayers

Just one positive thought in the morning can change your whole day. - Unknown

Truth and right are above utility in all realms of thought and action. - Charles William Eliot

My wife and I thought we were in love, but it turned out to be benign. - Woody Allen

A great many people think that polysyllables are a sign of intelligence. - Barbara Walters

Wit is a sword; it is meant to make people feel the point as well as see it. - G K Chesterton

It is often a sign of wit not to show it, and not to see that others want it. - Suzanne Necker

In conversation, humor is worth more than wit and easiness more than knowledge. - George Herbert

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words. - Robert Frost

To be satisfied with yourself is a sure sign that your forward motion has stopped. - Unknown

I'm having difficulty getting the doctors around here to sign the appropriate form. - Spike Milligan

I always thought that bagels and lox was my soul food, but it turns out it's sushi. - Sara Sheridan

They would not find me changed from him they knew - only more sure of all I thought was true. - Robert Frost

And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Her virtue was that she said what she thought, her vice that what she thought didn't amount to much. - Peter Ustinov

The imagination exercises a powerful influence over every act of sense, thought, reason, over every idea. - Latin Proverb

But the thought of being a lunatic did not greatly trouble him; the horror was that he might also be wrong. - George Orwell

It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it. - Maurice Switzer

I never used to like babies. I'd always thought if a baby were more like a chimpanzee, I'd have one. - Candice Bergen

If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative. - Woody Allen

The man who sees the consistency in things is a wit; the man who sees the inconsistency in things is a humorist. - G K Chesterton

The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. - Calvin

Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you're riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. - Bob Marley

Who is apt, on occasion, to assign a multitude of reasons when one will do? This is a sure sign of weakness in argument. - Harriet Martineau

No real social change has ever been brought about without a revolution... revolution is but thought carried into action. - Emma Goldman

My Dad once said, "you wouldn't worry so much about what people thought of you if you knew how seldom they did." - Dr. Phil McGraw

The greatest sign of success for a teacher is to be able to say, "The children are now working as if I did not exist." - Maria Montessori

Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others, you should put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give. - Eleanor Roosevelt

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin


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