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Tearable Puns

Word play is an art form. A pun is its own reword!

Tearable Puns thanks to Jack Boersma

Quite possibly the worst of the wurst

Tearable Puns thanks to Jack Boersma

QuotaBills
A pun is the lowest form of wit. - John Dennis

Is there another word for synonym? - George Carlin

Fair speech may hide a foul heart. - JRR Tolkien

A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

Speech is the small change of silence. - George Meredith

The eyes have one language everywhere. - George Herbert

Poetry is what gets lost in translation. - Robert Frost

Nothing you can't spell will ever work. - Will Rogers

A proverb is to speech what salt is to food. - Arabic Proverb

A story is told as much by silence as by speech. - Susan Griffin

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence. - Xenocrates

Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech. - Martin Fraquhar Tupper

All poetry is a reproduction of the tones of actual speech. - Robert Frost

You don't have good grammar when you type with your fists. - C.F. Payne

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. - Buck Henry

You're not a star until they can spell your name in Karachi. - Humphrey Bogart

May my last breath be drawn through a pipe and exhaled in a pun. - Charles Lamb

Retire? I can't spell the word. I'd play in a wheelchair. - Keith Richards

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. - Mark Twain

Out of suffering comes creativity. You cannot spell painting without pain. - John Lithgow

The language of the law must not be foreign to the ears of those who are to obey it. - Learned hand

Of puns it has been said that they who most dislike them are least able to utter them. - Edgar Allan Poe

Speak when you're angry and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret. - L.J. Peter

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. - Jimmy Durante

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid. - Soren Kierkegaard

Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

I never made a mistake in grammar but once in my life, and as soon as I done it. I seen it. - Carl Sandburg

The first man to use abusive language instead of his fists was the founder of civilization. - Sigmund Freud

Language is our meeting place, the sea we live in…it is the common ground of our humanity. - Toby Wolfe

Grammar, which knows how to lord it over kings, and with high hands makes them obey its laws. - Moliere

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to. - Unknown

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

If the English language made any sense, 'lackadaisical' would have something to do with a shortage of flowers. - Doug Larson

The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton

Two may talk together under the same roof for many years, yet never really meet; and two others at first speech are old friends. - Mary Catherwood

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language?
One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap. - Red Skelton

No matter how bad things are, they can always be worse. So what if my stroke left me with a speech impediment? Moses had one, and he did all right. - Kirk Douglas

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


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