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Tearable Puns

Word play is an art form. A pun is its own reword!

Tearable Puns thanks to Jack Boersma

Quite possibly the worst of the wurst

Tearable Puns thanks to Jack Boersma

QuotaBills
A pun is the lowest form of wit. - John Dennis

Puns are a form of humor with words. - Guillermo C. Infante

The eyes have one language everywhere. - George Herbert

Poetry is what gets lost in translation. - Robert Frost

Dance is the hidden language of the soul. - Martha Graham

Nothing you can't spell will ever work. - Will Rogers

Tears at times have all the weight of speech. - Ovid

My puns are not trivial. They are quadrivial. - James Joyce

Music is well said to be the speech of angels. - Thomas Carlyle

A story is told as much by silence as by speech. - Susan Griffin

I will not down to posterity talking bad grammar. - Benjamin Disraeli

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence. - Xenocrates

Life is a foreign language; all men mispronounce it. - Christopher Morley

Language exerts hidden power, like a moon on the tides. - Rita Mae Brown

Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns. - Groucho Marx

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. - Buck Henry

There is no language like the Irish for soothing and quieting. - John Millington Synge

Think like a wise man but communicate in the language of the people. - William Butler Yeats

A pun is the lowest form of humor, unless you thought of it yourself. - Doug Larson

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. - Mark Twain

I don't care what you say about me. Just be sure to spell my name wrong. - Barbra Streisand

Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. - John Erskine

If we are a country committed to free speech, then why do we have phone bills? - Steven Wright

A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the first word you thought of. - Burt Bacharach

Actions, looks, words and steps form the alphabet by which you may spell character. - Johann Kasper Lavater

I personally think we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain. - Jane Wagner

Nostalgia is like a grammar lesson: you find the present tense, but the past perfect. - Owens L. Pomeroy

Of puns it has been said that they who most dislike them are least able to utter them. - Edgar Allan Poe

Speak when you're angry and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret. - L.J. Peter

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. - Jimmy Durante

A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous. - Ingrid Bergman

A person's name is, to that person, the sweetest, most important sound in any language. - Dale Carnegie

Grammar: the difference between Feeling Your Nuts and Feeling You're Nuts. - Unknown

Language is our meeting place, the sea we live in…it is the common ground of our humanity. - Toby Wolfe

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech. - George Bernard Shaw

If the English language made any sense, 'lackadaisical' would have something to do with a shortage of flowers. - Doug Larson

The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton

The wise man is but a clever infant, spelling letters from a hieroglyphical prophetic book, the lexicon of which lies in eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language?
One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap. - Red Skelton


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