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Unhappy Baby

Starting life with a pessimistic attitude

Unhappy Baby thanks to Stan Kay

History of the middle finger

QuotaBills
A bambiraptor is a savage baby dear. - Alan Davies

Hope is the last thing to abandon the unhappy. - Unknown

You take more pictures of your baby than NASA does of Mars. - Unknown

Every baby born into the world is a finer one than the last. - Charles Dickens

There is not a more unhappy being than a superannuated idol. - Joseph Addison

After your death, you will be what you were before your birth. - Arthur Schopenhauer

A baby is born with a need to be loved - and never outgrows it. - Frank A. Clark

One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control. - Rodney Dangerfield

Neither fire nor wind, birth nor death can erase our good deeds. - Buddha

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. - Leo J Burke

It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant. - Richard J. Ferris

My Birth Certificate is so old, it's written in Roman Numerals. - Bill Carter

Having a baby is like trying to push a grand piano through a transom. - Alice Roosevelt Longworth

I love you like crazy, baby
'Cuz I'd go crazy without you. - Pixie Foudre

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Insomnia: a contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents. - Shannon Fife

He has so many muscles he has to make an appointment to move his fingers. - Phyllis Diller

It's a battle with himself and with the ticking fingers of the clock. - David Coleman

Mexico: where life is cheap, death is rich, and the buzzards are never unhappy. - Edward Abbey

The most effective form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids. - Jill Bensley

The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby. - Mary Marsh

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die. - Mel Brooks

If newborn babies could speak they would be the most intelligent beings on planet earth. - Jaden Smith

I have been very happy, very rich, very beautiful, much adulated, very famous, and very unhappy. - Brigitte Bardot

I look at what I have not and think myself unhappy; others look at what I have and think me happy. - Unknown

When I go home, I play with my baby dolls and strollers and diaper bags, and play with my sisters. - Dakota Fanning

Wherever I go, people are waving at me. Maybe if I do a good job, they'll use all their fingers. - Frank King

A certificate of live birth is not the same thing by any stretch of the imagination as a birth certificate. - Donald Trump

The baby bat
Screamed out in fright,
'Turn on the dark,
I'm afraid of the light.' - Shel Silverstein

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. - Sam Levenson

If you deliberately set out to be less than you are capable, you'll probably be unhappy for the rest of your life. - Abraham Maslow

Menopause: because nature decided that pregnancy, labor, delivery, breastfeeding, and stretch marks wasn't enough. - Unknown

The circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are. - Mewtwo

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to squeeze in eight hours of TV a day. - Homer Simpson

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

No one ever wants to see his or her name linked to anything bad. Conscience is like a baby. It has to go to sleep before you can. - Harvey Mackay

It isn't what you have, or who you are, or where you are, or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about. - Dale Carnegie

Our babies are like penguins; penguin babies can't exist unless more than one person is taking care of them. They just can't keep going. - Alison Gopnik


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