#1 humor site on the 'net

Church Karma

Stolen AC units present hot options

Church Karma thanks to Warren Ralston

QuotaBills
Hell is full of musical amateurs. - George Bernard Shaw

Wedded be thou to the hags of hell. - William Shakespeare

Tea is a religion of the art of life. - Okakura Kakuzo

Religion is the opiate of the masses. - Karl Marx

Karma yoga is a supreme secret indeed. - Bhagavad Gita

If you're going through hell, keep going. - Winston Churchill

Who has a bad wife, his hell begins on earth. - Dutch Proverb

Show me a liar, and I'll show you a thief. - George Herbert

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company. - Mark Twain

The robbed that smiles, steals something from the thief. - William Shakespeare

The only thing worth stealing is a kiss from a sleeping child. - Joe Houldsworth

My mind is the only sanctuary that has not been stolen from me. - Christopher Paolini

Love is something sent from heaven to worry the hell out of you. - Dolly Parton

Don King is a big ... thief, and everyone in this room knows it. - Donald Trump

Don't they get afraid, then?
They have a religion for that. - Ray Bradbury

There is only one religion, though there are a hundred versions of it. - George Bernard Shaw

Give me a couple of pages of the Bible, and I'll give you a picture. - Cecil B. DeMille

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

There's no better book with which to defend the Bible than the Bible itself. - Dwight L. Moody

I'm a Catholic deer hunter. I am happy to be clinging to my guns and my religion. - Paul Ryan

He was always late on principle; his principle being that punctuality is the thief of time. - Oscar Wilde

Disease is war with the laws of our being, and all war, as a great general has said, is hell. - Lewis G. Janes

Religion is like a map. The route isn't important. It's the destination that matters. - Marianne Williamson

The darkest part of hell is reserved for those who maintain neutrality in times of moral crisis. - Dante

Such a figure, that imagination cannot form an idea of a fury from hell, to look more frightful. - Charles Johnson

Let us build a church so great that those who come after us may thing us mad to have attempted it. - Unknown

Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd,
Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorned. - William Congreve

Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip. - Winston Churchill

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

If I were ever prosecuted for my religion, I truly hope there would be enough evidence to convict me. - John Wooden

I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls in to line. - Lucille Ball

The whole religious complexion of the modern world is due to the absence from Jerusalem of a lunatic asylum. - Havelock Ellis

In hell there is no other punishment than to begin over and over again the tasks left unfinished in your lifetime. - Andre Gide

No bum that can't speak poifect English oughta stay in this country - oughta be de-exported the hell outta here! - Archie Bunker

It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand. - Mark Twain

You must mind and not lower the Church in people's eyes by seeming to be frightened about it for such a little thing. - George Eliot

I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner. - WC Fields

We are in the world to laugh. In purgatory or in hell we shall no longer be able to do so. And in heaven it would not be proper. - Jules Renard

To say that authority, whether secular or religious, supplies no ground for morality is not to deny the obvious fact that it supplies a sanction. - Joseph Addison


My Last Swim In The Ocean

Dog Tired After Work

Hammock Wine

Parenting Skills

Property Boundary

Tree Nurture

Beer Floating

Police Targeting

Hard Hat Safety

Don't Try This At Home

Canadian Bees

Spray-On Clothing

Five Firm Brakes Tire

Venice in Winter

Turntable Bike

Sail Flight

Number Eight Laziness

Newfie Snowplow

Safety Nap

$383.00 Paint Job

Boneless Chicken

Hiking For Beginners

Mustache Soother

Been Sleeping In The Sun