#1 humor site on the 'net

Customers Wanted

How to attract consumers with do-it-yourself marketing

Customers Wanted thanks to Lou Rawls

Help Wanted signs where no experience necessary

QuotaBills
There are no dumb customers. - Peter F Drucker

The only risk of failure is promotion. - Scott Adams

Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes. - Oscar Wilde

Experience teaches slowly, and at the cost of mistakes. - James A. Froude

An optimist is simply a pessimist with no job experience. - Dilbert

The most dangerous strategy is to jump a chasm in two leaps. - Benjamin Disraeli

Experience is the name so many people give to their mistakes. - Oscar Wilde

Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want. - Dan Stanford

Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name. - Milton Berle

Increasingly, the mass marketing is turning into a mass of niches. - Chris Anderson

Experience is always a good teacher, but she often has dull pupils. - Unknown

Trekking means a travelling experience with a thrilling excitement. - Amit Kalantri

Marketing is far too important to leave to the marketing department. - David Packard

Genius is the ability to renew one's emotions in daily experience. - Paul Cezanne

Advertising has annihilated the power of the most powerful adjectives. - Paul Valery

Judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment. - Simon Bolivar

A man has no ears for that to which experience has given him no access. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

I never think of my audiences as customers. I think of them as partners. - James Stewart

There is no black magic to successfully attracting customers via the Web. - Rand Fishkin

Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from poor judgment. - Unknown

Never, for the sake of peace and quiet, deny your own experience or convictions. - Dag Hammarskjold

Smartphones are reinventing the connection between companies and their customers. - Rich Miner

A failure is a man who has blundered but is not able to cash in on the experience. - Elbert Hubbard

There is no such thing as a bad client, but there such a thing as bad advertising. - Jerry D Femina

The wisdom of the wise and the experience of the ages are perpetuated by quoatations. - Benjamin Disraeli

Experience is not what happens to a man. It is what a man does with what happens to him. - Aldous Huxley

Life is short, art long, opportunity fleeting, experience treacherous, judgment difficult. - Hypocrites

Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. - Greg King

Half the money I spend on advertising is wasted; the trouble is, I don't know which half. - John Wannamaker

It's our experience that political leaders don't always mean the opposite of what they say. - Abba Eban

Networking is marketing. Marketing yourself, marketing your uniqueness, marketing what you stand for. - Christine Comaford-Lynch

It no longer makes economic sense to send an advertising message to the many in hopes of persuading the few. - M. Lawrence Light

We deem those happy who, from the experience of life, have learned to bear its ills, without being overcome by them. - Juvenal

Year's end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us. - Hal Borland

Audiences everywhere are tough. They don't have time to be bored or brow beaten by orthodox, old fashioned advertising. - Craig Davis

Instead of one-way interruption, Web marketing is about delivering useful content at just the precise moment that a buyer needs it. - David M. Scott

I'm building a glass pyramid over the Egyptian escalator where my body will be mummified, so my customers can come and see me forever. - Mohamed Al-Fayed

Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, or worn. It is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace & gratitude. - Denis Waitley

Advertising moves the goods - if it's good advertising. Bad advertising doesn't move the goods because it doesn't move the buyers. - Unknown

If you have more money than brains, you should focus on outbound marketing. If you have more brains than money, you should focus on inbound marketing. - Guy Kawasaki


Yoga in Palm Springs

Bartender Spill

Tetris Logger

Pigging Out in El Paso

Foot Care

Guitar Dog

Cutout Coin Silhouettes

Tree Tattoo

Alt-Ctrl-Del Pillows

Portable GPS

Australian Cyclist

Helicopter Cuts

Holland Bike Lane - For Pros Only

Twins' First Piano Lesson

Foosball for Girls

Youth Walk

Last Selfie

Broccoli Muffins

Get Along Shirt

Rooftop Steps

It's Not My Job

Mathematician's Truck

Redneck Baby Stroller

Redneck Estate Sale