#1 humor site on the 'net

How To Steal An Election

Why do politicians gerrymander electoral districts?

How To Steal An Election thanks to Mike Duffy

QuotaBills
Politics have no relation to morals. - Niccolo Machiavelli

In politics nothing is contemptible. - Benjamin Disraeli

Crime does not pay as well as politics. - Alfred E. Newman

Everybody knows politics is a contact sport. - Barrack Obama

Man is not free unless government is limited. - Ronald Reagan

Intelligence has nothing to do with politics. - Londo Molari

The problem with political jokes is they get elected. - Henry Cate, VII

The art of government is the organization of idolatry. - George Bernard Shaw

All diplomacy is a continuation of war by other means. - Zhou Enlai

Government always finds a need for whatever money it gets. - Ronald Reagan

World War II was the last government program that really worked. - George Will

For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program. - Bob Wells

A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country. - Tex Guinan

Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week. - Will Rogers

A politician will do anything to keep his job - even become a patriot. - William Randolph

We would all like to vote for the best man but he is never a candidate. - Kin Hubbard

To say nothing, especially when speaking, is half the art of diplomacy. - Will Durant

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for. - Will Rogers

Freedom of opinion can only exist when the government thinks itself secure. - Bertrand Russell

I do have a political agenda. It's to have as few regulations as possible. - Dan Quayle

Diplomacy is the art of saying, "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock. - Will Rogers

What right does Congress have to go around making laws just because they deem it necessary? - Marion Barry

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. - Robert Frost

What is the first part of politics? Education. The second? Education. And the third? Education. - Jules Michelet

So, if we lie to the government, it's a felony.
But if they lie to us, it's politics. - Bill Murray

A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them. - P.J. O'Rourke

Folks who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign. - Milton Berle

Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev

Politics is not the art of the possible. It consists in choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable. - John Kenneth Galbraith

The hardest thing about any political campaign is how to win without proving that you are unworthy of winning. - Theodor Adorno

It is a win-win for the American people, an idea no conventional politician would have the guts to put forward. - Donald Trump

I won't eat anything that has intelligent life, but I would gladly eat a network executive or a politician. - Marty Feldman

At present, our country needs women's idealism and determination, perhaps more in politics than anywhere else. - Shirley Chisholm

The business of government is to keep the government out of business - that is, unless business needs government aid. - Will Rogers

I have wondered at times what the Ten Commandments would have looked like if Moses had run them through the US Congress. - Ronald Reagan

I am sometimes a fox and sometimes a lion. The whole secret of government lies in knowing when to be the one or the other. - Napoleon Bonaparte

One lesson you better learn if you want to be in politics is that you never go out on a golf course and beat the President. - Lyndon B. Johnson

Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage. - Ambrose Bierce

Every country must be absolutely free to adopt the type of economic, political and social system that it considers convenient. - Fidel Castro

In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. - Voltaire


Underground Stairway

That's Not A Bagpipe!

Segregation Is A Two-Way Street

Dog Wallpaper

Spiral Staircase

Clogged Sink

Scuba Diving Sucks

Water Bomber Pilot

Car Paint

Scottish Haircut

The Definition Of Old

Redneck Pool Table

Clint Eastwood

Playing Through

Island Music

Arch Enemies

Firemen's Revenge

Pipeline Security

Gun Exhaust

Canadian Food Chain

Flintstone Drum Set

Bird Cage Illness

Grasping Shirt

Lip Clouds