#1 humor site on the 'net

Kid Disposal

Cleaning out the Gene pool in Chinatown

Kid Disposal thanks to Keith Blake

Little Johnny becomes the take-out meal

QuotaBills
I love shark week, all kids swim for free. - Josh Stern

Inspiration exists, but it must find you working. - Pablo Picasso

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

Kids don't remember their best day of television. - Unknown

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

Inspiration fires you up; motivation keeps you burning. - Stuart Aken

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley

Amateurs wait for inspiration. The real pros get up and go to work. - Harvey Mackay

Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration. - Thomas Edison

Raising kids make most people, including me, grow up at least a little. - Madonna

All kids are gifted: some just open their packages earlier than others. - Michael Carr

You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club. - Jack London

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Silence is golden unless you have kids. Then silence is just suspicious. - Unknown

Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. - Fred Astaire

Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson

All kids need is a little help, a little hope, and somebody who believes in them. - Earvin "Magic" Johnson

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

My wife and I have a tradition of popcorn and videos with our kids on Friday evenings. - Ozwald Boateng

Do we not all agree to call rapid thought and noble impulse by the name of inspiration? - George Eliot

If we would listen to our kids, we'd discover that they are largely self-explanatory. - Robert Brault

The most beautiful thing in the world is, precisely, the conjunction of learning and inspiration. - Wanda Landowska

You know how kids dream of being soccer players or actors? Well, my dream was to be a sushi chef. - Nobu Matsuhisa

Success is the good fortune that comes from aspiration, desperation, perspiration and inspiration. - Evan Esar

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

All kids are trouble, Edith. And I don't wanna spend my reclining years trying to raise another one. - Archie Bunker

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

Inspiration comes unawares, from unaccountable sources that have nothing to do with planning or intelligence. - Maurice Chevalier

Here lies my past.
Good-bye I have kissed it;
Thank you, kids.
I wouldn’t have missed it. - Ogden Nash

I love to go to a movie, get a Diet Coke and a barrel of popcorn, and sit there with my kids and watch a film. - William Shatner

Enthusiasm is the inspiration of everything great. Without it no man is to be feared, and with it none despised. - Christian Nevell Bovee

One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity there ain't nothing can beat teamwork. - Mark Twain

You know your kids are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going. - P.J. O'Rourke

There's a limit to how many times you can read how great you are and what an inspiration you are, but I'm not there yet. - Randy Pausch

You've probably got a device on you that can shoot decent video, so what's stopping you? Capture and share some moments. - Steve Garfield

The more difficulties one has to encounter, within and without, the more significant and the higher in inspiration his life will be. - Horace Bushnell

If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer


WrenchWare

Pushing The Envelope

Social Media Explained

Pumping Services

Turn Into Lanes

Bull Squirrel

Sleep With Us

One Tough Lady!

Meep Meep

Just Thinking

Boneless Bananas

Fallen Heroes

Best Way To Honor The Fallen

Veterans Day Holiday

Life of Freedom and Peace

It's A Pittance Of Time

Patriot Blood

Juvenile Storage

Senior Wheelies

Dysfunctional Veteran

9 Month Scale

Young Who Suffer

Booger Queen

Expired Parking