#1 humor site on the 'net

Lo Rider Parking

How to avoid toll booths

Lo Rider Parking thanks to Laura Tennant

QuotaBills
Parking is such street sorrow. - Herb Caen

I do my very best to avoid shark fin. - Anthony Bourdain

It is idle to dread what you cannot avoid. - Publilius Syrus

People who avoid their fears also avoid their power. - Timothy Roderick

To avoid criticism do nothing, say nothing, be nothing. - Elbert Hubbard

I you want to avoid battles, stay out of the grassy areas. - Pokemon

You often meet your fate on the road you take to avoid it. - French Proverb

The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it. - Dale Carnegie

The way to avoid roadblocks to learning is to ask questions. - Joseph J. Thomas

A person often meets his destiny on the road he took to avoid it. - Jean de La Fontaine

Always be ready to speak your mind, and a base man will avoid you. - William Blake

In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily. - Count Talleyrand

A man must learn to endure patiently what he cannot avoid conveniently. - Michel de Montaigne

The avoidance of taxes is the only pursuit that still carries any reward. - John Maynard Keynes

It's not the bulls or the bears you need to avoid, it's the bum steers. - Chuck Hillis

Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you. - Winston Churchill

There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing. - Aristotle

People spend entire lifetimes trying to avoid the things that have already happened. - Silvia Hartmann

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid. - Soren Kierkegaard

The more you learn about the dignity of the gorilla, the more you want to avoid people. - Dian Fossey

A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works. - Bill Vaughan

At the door of life, by the gate of breath, there are worse things waiting for men than death. - A.C. Swinburne The Triumph Of Time

There ain't no man can avoid being born average. But there ain't no man got to be common. - Satchel Paige

The problem in this world is to avoid concentration of power - we must have a dispersion of power. - Milton Friedman

Humility before the flower at the timber line is the gate which gives access to the path up the open fell. - Dag Hammarskjold

To avoid an occasion for our virtues is a worse degree of failure than to push forward pluckily and make a fall. - Robert Louis Stevenson

One of the endearing things about mathematicians is the extent to which they will go to avoid doing any real work. - Matthew Pordage

Both in thought and in feeling, even though time be real, to realise the unimportance of time is the gate of wisdom. - Bertrand Russell

Lock up your libraries if you like; but there is no gate, no lock, no bolt that you can set upon the freedom of my mind. - Virginia Woolf

In most homes, the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar

The very things we wish to avoid, neglect and flee from turn out to be the 'prima materia' from which all real growth comes. - Andrew Harvey

Change is one of the scariest things in the world and yet it is also one of those variables of human existence that no one can avoid. - Aberjhani

Perseverance is a great element of success; if you only knock long enough and loud enough at the gate, you are sure to wake up somebody. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking. - Bill Vaughan

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright

A "no" uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a "yes" merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble. - Mahatma Gandhi

One should respect public opinion insofar as is necessary to avoid starvation and keep out of prison, but anything that goes beyond this is voluntary submission to an unnecessary tyranny. - Bertrand Russell

One thing to avoid is trendy stuff, though - you gotta go timeless. Even if you want a little luxury in your life and you want to splurge on a Gucci bag, pick a great black one you can wear all the time. - NeNe Leakes

Happiness is like a cat. If you try to coax it, it will avoid you; it will never come. But if you pay no attention to it and go about your business, you'll find it rubbing against your legs and jumping into your lap. - William Bennett

We are motivated more by aversion to the unpleasant than by a will toward truth, freedom, or healing. We are constantly attempting to escape our life, to avoid rather than enter our pain we, and we wonder why it is so difficult to be fully alive. - Stephen Levine


Milking Time On The Farm

Chain Mail

Lunch Break

Wash Day On The Farm

High Tide Heels

Frozen Fish Meal

Stork Exhaust

I 'Saw' An Accident

Protractor Cook

Street Genius

Rebar Walker

No Worries

Road To Success

Politician Training

Math in Africa

Customers Wanted

Sock Storage

Hung Out To Dry

Need More Horsepower?

Japanese Diving Platform

Water Taxi

Wrench Family

How To Burn Fat

Ghetto Boat