#1 humor site on the 'net

Long Liquor Store

Cold Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer Sales - Long line specialists

Long Liquor Store thanks to Keith Blake

Attention to long lines is their specialty

QuotaBills
Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King

Coffee and love taste best when hot. - German Proverb

A morning without coffee is like sleep. - Unknown

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

When coffee dreams, it dreams of chocolate. - Unknown

I like my men like I like my coffee. Silent. - Anna Kendrick

Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown

Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee? - Albert Camus

I have measured out my life with coffee spoons. - T S Eliot

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

I only drink coffee grown in high altitude rain forests. - Rob Dyrdek

Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson

Life without books, chocolate and coffee is just useless. - Nadun Lokuliyanage

I think if I were a woman I'd wear coffee as a perfume. - John Van Druten

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems. - Paul Erdos

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

Coffee and chocolate - the inventor of mocha should be sainted. - Cherise Sinclair

Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee. - Stephanie Piro

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. - Steven Wright

What would life be without coffee? But then, what is it even with coffee? - King Louis XV

I never drink coffee at lunch - I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon. - Ronald Reagan

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

If there's no coffee, I'm not getting up. Make Groundhog Day just better. - ethicalbean

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

I just want a hot cup of coffee, black, and I don't want to hear about your troubles. - Charles Bukowski

You haven't had enough coffee until you can thread a sewing machine while it's running. - Unknown

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood. - Phyllis Diller

If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - the Joe-kster

Blind dates are treacherous. You don't know who this person is. You wonder, "Should I call my grandma during coffee to get out of this?" - Alan Alda


Ice Cream Rose

Dawn Gone

Bolt Action Door

You Want Me To Do What?

Metro Support

Fear Of Light

South Africa Taxi

Child Disarma-meant

Propane Diving

Leave Toes Outside

Tightrope Bike

China Road Load

Mega Samurai Puzzles A

Chinese Road Rocks

Lunch Break on a Hot Day

Chinese Deer Hunter

Redneck Chinese Food

Shakespeare - The Early Years

Sock Anatomy

Chinese Buffet

China Assignment

Chinese BBQ

Fast Food in Beijing

Dark Ages for Jews