#1 humor site on the 'net

Second Hand Work

Turning Disability into Ability

Second Hand Work thanks to Dick Brighton, North Vancouver, B.C.

Where there's a Will there's a way

QuotaBills
Hope is a very unruly emotion. - Gloria Steinem

Success is due less to ability than to zeal. - Charles Buxton

There are no elevators in the house of success. - H.H. Vreeland

Spring work is going on with joyful enthusiasm. - John Muir

Nothing succeeds like the appearance of success. - Christopher Lasch

Sloppy success is better than perfect mediocrity. - Alex Mandossian

I am prepared for the worst, but hope for the best. - Benjamin Disraeli

None are so old as those who have outlived enthusiasm. - Henry David Thoreau

Character is the real foundation of all worthwhile success. - John Hays Hammond

The secret of my success is a two-word answer: Know people. - Harvey S Firestone

The success that the Tolkien books had redefined modern fantasy. - George R.R. Martin

My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes

Amateurs wait for inspiration. The real pros get up and go to work. - Harvey Mackay

Whosoever desires constant success must change his conduct with the times. - Niccolo Machiavelli

We must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope. - Martin Luther King Jr.

Success is when you look back at your life and the memories make you smile. - Phoebe L. Moll

I gotta lose weight, Edith. I hope you remembered my diuretic cottage cheese. - Archie Bunker

Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces people into thinking they can't lose. - Bill Gates

Few men have the natural strength to honour a friend's success without envy. - Aeschylus

Enthusiasm is excitement with inspiration, motivation, and a pinch of creativity. - Bo Bennett

Creativity comes from trust. Trust your instincts. And never hope more than you work. - Rita Mae Brown

Hope is the anchor of the soul, the stimulus to action, and the incentive to achievement. - Unknown

If you're absent during my struggle, don't expect to be present during my success. - Will Smith

The grand essentials of life are something to do, something to love, something to hope for. - Thomas Chalmers

Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did. - Newt Gingrich

Success does not consist in never making blunders, but in never making the same one a second time. - Josh Billings

A sentimentalist is simply one who desires to have the luxury of an emotion without paying for it. - Oscar Wilde

Youth fades; love droops; the leaves of friendship fall. A mother's secret hope outlives them all. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

There are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure. - Gen. Colin L. Powell

Its success lies in the fact that it's an insurance plan, not an investment plan or a welfare plan. - James Roosevelt

Admiration is a very short-lived passion, that immediately decays upon growing familiar with its object. - Joseph Addison

Asthma is a disease that has practically the same symptoms as passion except that with asthma it lasts longer. - Unknown

There is a certain enthusiasm in liberty that makes human nature rise above itself, in acts of bravery and heroism. - Alexander Hamilton

The power of fortune is confessed only by the miserable; for the happy impute all their success to prudence and merit. - Jonathan Swift

I cannot give you the formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure, which is: Try to please everybody. - Herbert Bayard Swope

The first step toward success is taken when you refuse to be a captive of the environment in which you first find yourself. - Mark Caine

It was character that got us out of bed, commitment that moved us into action, and discipline that enabled us to follow through. - Zig Ziglar

Success is not to be measured by the position someone has reached in life, but the obstacles he has overcome while trying to succeed. - Booker T. Washington

Those who succeed have a clear, focused picture of their success. The level of success they attain matches the expansiveness of their dreams. - Marc Allen

No one is going to hand me success. I must go out and get it myself. That's why I'm here. To dominate. To conquer. Both the world and myself. - Unknown


Lawntastic Scenery

Hallway Detour

For Your Synths

Ladder Load

Beach Drag

Amish Smart Car

Sitting on the Hot Seat

Redneck Wiener Roast

Free Trip To Heaven

Is There a Hell For Animals?

Double Line Parking

Without Government

Nose For Coke

Crisp Chips

3 Stages Of A Man's Life

Tipsy Crane

Clear View

Redneck Ladder

Home Depot Delivery

Taco Bell Secret Seasoning

Are You OK?

Downchuck

Rickshaw Workout

Tenacity