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Smirnoff Women

We don't serve women here - you have to bring your own

Smirnoff Women thanks to Frank Howard

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Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman - Christopher Walken

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

Women hold up half the sky. - Mao Zedong

In wine, there is the truth. - Pliny the Elder

I like a wine that fights back. - John Steed

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping. - Oscar Wilde

I've been told I'm a role model to many women. - Donald Trump

Man can not live on chocolate alone.... but women can. - Unknown

All women are crazy, it's only a question of degree. - WC Fields

I think housework is the reason most women go to the office. - Heloise Cruse

A woman can say more in a sigh than a man can say in a sermon. - Arnold Haultain

Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson

That woman is liable to come at you like a Doberman's Pincher. - Archie Bunker

He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of. - Mae West

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. - Benjamin Franklin

The three words every woman really longs to hear: I'll clean up. - Molly Shannon

There's two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither one works. - Will Rogers

Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more. - James Stephens

To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson

A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often. - Oliver Herford

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. - Aristotle Onassis

A woman is like a teabag. Only in hot water do you realize how strong she is. - Nancy Reagan

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

I will buy any creme, cosmetic, or elixir from a woman with a European accent. - Erma Bombeck

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

Beauty is the first present nature gives to a woman and the first it takes away. - Fay Weldon

The most beautiful makeup for a woman is passion. But cosmetics are easier to buy. - Yves St. Laurent

One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. - Samuel Johnson

And what is better than wisdom? Woman. And what is better than a good woman? Nothing. - Geoffrey Chaucer

A man who moralizes is usually a hypocrite, and a woman who moralizes is usually plain. - Oscar Wilde

Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed. - Oscar Wilde

Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz

Some old women and men grow bitter with age. The more their teeth drop out, the more biting they get. - George D. Prentice

My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty. - Woody Allen

Democracy is very different in U.S. and A. from Kazakhstan. In America, woman can vote, but horse cannot! - Borat Sagdiyev

If women want any rights more than they got, why don't they just take them and not be talking about it? - Sojourner Truth

I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with the word 'Guess' on it. I said, "Thyroid problem?" - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Women are the most powerful magnet in the universe. And all men are cheap metal. And we all know where north is. - Larry Miller

There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid

We women know how to take care of everybody so well. But the one person we have written out of the equation is us. - Suze Orman

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. - Sam Levenson

There is nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It is a thing no married man knows anything about. - Oscar Wilde

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

I think the only difference between me and the other candidates is that I'm more honest and my women are more beautiful. - Donald Trump

Can't figure women. Sometimes they're afraid of a spider, other times they're not afraid to stand right up to the devil. - Donal Harding

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman - it depends on how much happiness you can handle. - George Burns

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking. - Bill Vaughan


Walkway To Heaven

Groucho Marx and Jimmy Savile

Despicable Shoes

Prayer Conditioning

Lazy People Make Excellent Engineers

Spaghetti Western

Under The Weather

Backpack Barney

My Sweet Potato

Who Needs a Guard Dog?

My Next Life

Mouse Insider

Close Ups

Redneck Camera Phone

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Redneck Cupboard

Homeless Signs

Floor Store

Mary Go Round

City Beach Castle

Rescue Pup

Your Meal Is Ready

Bicycle Water Bottle Holder

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