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Then you add two forkfuls of cooking oil. - The French Chef

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

Recipe for a happy husband: Fake and Bake. - Unknown

The best food is whatever fills the belly. - Arab Proverb

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life. - Oliver C. Wilson

She did not so much cook as assassinate food. - Storm Jameson

Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough. - Mark Twain

I drink to make other people more interesting. - Ernest Hemingway

Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is. - Jimmy Durante

The English contribution to world cuisine. The chip. - John Cleese

Laughter is brightest in the place where the food is. - Ireland Proverb

The food in Yugoslavia is fine if you like pork tartare. - Ed Begley Jr.

I don't even butter my bread. I consider that cooking. - Katherine Cebrian

I was 32 when I started cooking; up until then, I just ate. - Julia Child

My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare. - Mike Myers

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown

Live in the sunshine
Swim in the sea
Drink the wild air - Ralph Waldo Emerson

You can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning. - Founder's Breakfast Stout

Chemically speaking, chocolate really is the world's perfect food. - Michael Levine

If you are looking for a fly in your food, it means that you are full. - South Africa Proverb

I drink too much. Last time I gave a urine sample there was an olive in it. - Rodney Dangerfield

Drinking gives one a very clear sense of who's to blame for everything. - Unknown

Watermelon - it's a good fruit. You eat, you drink, you wash your face. - Enrico Caruso

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

One reason I don't drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time. - Nancy Astor

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

I like spaghetti bolognese, I like baked beans on toast. I hate French food. I hate fancy food. - Simon Cowell

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose. - Garrison Keillor

The automatic stabilizer is unemployment insurance, food stamps, additional coverage of Medicaid. - Franklin Raines

Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside. - Mark Twain

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

A burrito is a delicious food item that breaks down all social barriers and leads to temporary spiritual enlightenment. - Lisi Harrison

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth. - George Burns

I like simple food, seasoned with just salt, pepper, oil and vinegar. Complicated food and complicated lives are never good. - Sirio Maccioni

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown

How is it that mercury is not safe for food additives and Over the Counter drug products, but it is safe in our vaccines and dental amalgams? - Dan Burton

When I get through tearing a lobster apart, or one of those tender West Coast octopuses, I feel like I had a drink from the fountain of youth. - Joseph Mitchell


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