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SwimChair Man

Swimming pool safety for daredevil Redneck high-divers

SwimChair Man thanks to Shawn Kennedy

Rectum? Darned near killed him!

QuotaBills
Reclimbing chair - Archie Bunker

Too clever is dumb. - Ogden Nash

Act like a horse. Be dumb. Just run. - Unknown

I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid. - Terry Bradshaw

If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it. - Jonathan Winters

If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet? - Steven Wright

Most of life is choices, and the rest is pure dumb luck. - Marian Erickson

This is the place to be - in the land of swimming pools. - David Hockney

You will never get lessons on swimming from a drowning man. - Unknown

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard. - Steven Wright

There are 350 varieties of shark, not counting loan and pool. - L.M. Boyd

No man drowns if he perseveres in praying to God, and can swim. - Russian Proverb

The man who is swimming against the stream knows the strength of it. - Woodrow Wilson

The early bird would never catch the worm if the dumb worm slept late. - Milton Berle

You should not paint the chair, but only what someone has felt about it. - Edvard Munch

Committee work is like a soft chair - easy to get into but hard to get out of. - Kenneth J Shively

One of my goals in life is to have the biggest residential pool on the planet. - Drake

It's only when the tide goes out that you learn who's been swimming naked. - Warren Buffet

When people ask if I do my own stunts, I always answer, "Not on purpose." - Billy Bob Thornton

People who drink to drown their sorrow should be told that sorrow knows how to swim. - Ann Landers

Do not be afraid to ask dumb questions; they are easier to handle than dumb mistakes. - Unknown

I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming. - Jimmy Carter

If I swim in the ocean, I have a shark thought. Not a bad one, but just a little one. - Tea Leoni

In matters of style, swim with the current. In matters of principle, stand like a rock. - Thomas Jefferson

It's the Olympics. If you can't get up to swim early in the morning, don't go. - Michael Phelps

My husband, Fang, is so dumb I once said, "There's a dead bird." He looked up. - Phyllis Diller

I guess you would say I'd be like the Michael Phelps of swimming if he wasn't there. - Ryan Lochte

I drank because I wanted to drown my sorrows, but now the damned things have learned to swim. - Frida Kahlo

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. - Erica Jong

Although I am not stupid, the mathematical side of my brain is like dumb notes upon a damaged piano. - Margot Asquith

Chair pose is a defiance of spirit, showing how high you can reach even when you're forced down. - Unknown

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison. - WC Fields

I wanted to do something nice so I bought my mother-in-law a chair. Now they won't let me plug it in. - Henny Youngman

If you are in the job for glamour, you're in for the shock of your life. The media is a huge shark pool. - Trisha Goddard

You can't deny laughter. When it comes, it plops down in your favorite chair and stays as long as it wants. - Stephen King

It is just like man's vanity and impertinence to call an animal dumb because it is dumb to his dull perceptions. - Mark Twain

If one can only see things according to one's own belief system, one is destined to become virtually deaf, dumb, and blind. - Robert A. Wilson

Being in politics is like being a football coach; you have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important. - Eugene McCarthy

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson


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