#1 humor site on the 'net

The Dark Side of Christmas

AT-AT Walkers on the prowl

The Dark Side of Christmas thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Standing over 20 meters tall with blast-impervious armor plating, the All Terrain Armored Transport (AT-AT Walker) is a four-legged transport and combat vehicle used by the Imperial ground forces who specialize in surprise Christmas attacks

QuotaBills
For NASA, space is still a high priority. - Dan Quayle

Good Anakin. Good. Kill him. Kill him now. - Chancellor Palpatine

What we need is Star Peace and not Star Wars. - Mikhail Gorbachev

Space ails us moderns: we are sick with space. - Robert Frost

There would be no Christmas if there was no Easter. - Gordon B. Hinckley

I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan

My husband said he needed more space. So I locked him outside. - Roseanne Barr

He had them as spellbound as a room full of Ewoks listening to C-3PO. - Cory Doctorow

Space is almost infinite. As a matter of fact, we think it is infinite. - Dan Quayle

The dinosaurs became extinct because they didn't have a space program. - Larry Niven

Humor does not diminish the pain - it makes the space around it get bigger. - Allen Klein

Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson

If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova

Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

Anakin, you're breaking my heart! And you're going down a path I cannot follow! - Padme

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

Great music is as much about the space between the notes as it is about the notes themselves. - Sting

Most whale photos you see show whales in this beautiful blue water - it's almost like space. - Brian Skerry

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

Don't let negative and toxic people rent space in your head. Raise the rent and kick them out. - Zig Ziglar

No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas. - Robert Kirby

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

The way you can understand all of the social media is as the creation of a new kind of public space. - Danah Boyd

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

The larger office, the corner space, the extra window are the teddy bears and tricycles of adult office life. - Willard Gaylin

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

Be ruthless about your calendar - stick to it, hell or high water but create space for unstructured time as well. - Arjun Arora

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

Oh my. Space travel sounds rather perilous. I can assure you they will never get me on one of those dreadful Star Ships. - C-3PO

In most homes, the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar

Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump

The real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space. - Marilyn Monroe

As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind - every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder. - John Glenn

The space in a needle's eye is sufficient for two friends, but the whole world is scarcely big enough to hold two enemies. - Solomon Ibn Gabirol


iPhone Charger

Tube Travel

Redneck Tree Fort

OCD Guy

World's Tallest Bus

Long Liquor Store

Happy Wood Pig

On Top Of Things

Anail Retention

Bat Flight

The No Brainer

Truck Bender

Bacon Balls

Fast Closure

Ukrainian Feast

1934 Modern Home

Fliptus

Copper Tubing Specialist

Bach Off Van

Boss Resume

Canadian Gun Shop

Hogwart's Other Bridge

Excalibutter

As The World Turns