#1 humor site on the 'net

Transparent Touch Calculator

Looking through a calculation

Transparent Touch Calculator thanks to Mike King

QuotaBills
Oh, so they have internet on computers now! - Homer Simpson

One touch of nature makes the whole world kin. - William Shakespeare

At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet. - Plato

We steal if we touch tomorrow. It is God's. - Henry Ward Beecher

I took the initiative in creating the internet. - Al Gore

She caught a touch of laryngosis from the smoke. - Archie Bunker

Computer logic is no substitute for human wisdom. - Unknown

You can't touch music, but music can touch you. - Mordecai

Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. - John F Kennedy

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. - Steve Wozniak

Get in touch with your passion and put it to work at work. - Marilyn Suttle

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

Never touch your idols: the gilding will stick to your fingers. - Gustave Flaubert

For business, our Internet love affair was a gift from the gods. - Gary Vaynerchuk

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. - Paul Ehrlich

You touch some of the reasons for my going, not for my staying away. - Charles Dickens

Truth is as impossible to be soiled by any outward touch as the sunbeam. - John Milton

On the keyboard of life always keep one finger on the 'escape' key. - Unknown

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. - Emo Philips

Man only likes to count his troubles; he doesn't calculate his happiness. - Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Have a heart that never hardens, a temper that never tires, a touch that never hurts. - Charles Dickens

I don't consider myself a heavy drinker, I often go hours without touching a drop. - Noel Coward

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

I don't believe in e-mail. I'm an old-fashioned girl. I prefer calling and hanging up. - Sarah Jessica Parker

Of all sound of all bells... most solemn and touching is the peal which rings out the Old Year. - Charles Lamb

When you’re a nurse you know that every day you will touch a life or a life will touch yours. - Unknown

Learning by doing, peer-to-peer teaching, and computer simulation are all part of the same equation. - Nicholas Negroponte

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

Every two months, I would get an email, 'Skeleton Twins update: still don't have the money!' - Bill Hader

By giving us the opinions of the uneducated, journalism keeps us in touch with the ignorance of the community. - Oscar Wilde

The Internet has turned what used to be a controlled, one-way message into a real-time dialogue with millions. - Danielle Sacks

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. - Milton Berle

Word-of-mouth marketing has always been important. Today, it's more important than ever because of the Internet. - Newt Barrett

Love is like a beautiful flower which I may not touch, but whose fragrance makes the garden a place of delight just the same. - Helen Keller

My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them. - Penn Jillette

Just think how far we've come in the 20th Century. The man who used to be a cog in the wheel is now a digit in the computer. - Robert Fuoss

The day I made that statement, about inventing the internet, I was tired because I'd been up all night inventing the camcorder. - Al Gore

He either fears his fate too much,
Or his deserts are small,
Who dares not put it to the touch
To gain or lose it all - Marquis of Montrose

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

For the past 10 years, corporations have been trained that they should use all the different media. But the Internet is becoming the umbrella. - Larry Weber


Spring Is In The Air

Safe Seat Belt

Leaf Surgery

Keyboard Running Shoes

Ten Miles Gallery

30th 'Pearl' Wedding Anniversary of Trudy and Joe Defries

Pickup Bartender

Tree Loft

Instant Antidepressant

Ukraine Skype

Who Lost The Keys?

Great White Socks

Master Chef Eggspert

Tire Trike

Pokemon Chasing

Welcome To Texas

Which Way To Go?

Happy ARRRRRRRHH!

Underground Parking

TV Conference

Chair Master

Killing Bugs

Alligator Ice

Dog Walker