#1 humor site on the 'net

Wife Of The Year

Budweiser does its part to save marriage relationships

Wife Of The Year thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Kitimat, B.C. shopper after record-setting snowfall

QuotaBills
Take my wife - please! - Henny Youngman

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

Who has a bad wife, his hell begins on earth. - Dutch Proverb

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

My wife was too beautiful for words, but not for arguments. - John Barrymore

A woman is attractive when she is somebody else's wife. - African Proverb

I give unto my wife my second best bed, with the furniture. - William Shakespeare

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

Behind every successful man is a woman.
Behind her is his wife. - Groucho Marx

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

I'm having trouble managing the mansion. What I need is a wife. - Ella Grasso

My wife's an earth sign. I'm a water sign. Together we make mud. - Henny Youngman

I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her. - Rodney Dangerfield

All my wife wanted for Valentine's Day was a little card - American Express. - Milton Berle

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle

My wife likes to talk on the phone during sex. She called me from Chicago last night. - Rodney Dangerfield

I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming. - Jimmy Carter

My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea. - Henny Youngman

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

In life, it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out. - Joey Adams

It was partially my fault that we got divorced. I tended to place my wife under a pedestal. - Woody Allen

I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with 28 years ago. - Will Rogers

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day. - Jay Leno

A good wife is one who can mow the lawn in the summer and put up the storm windows in the winter. - WC Fields

My wife is a real Puritan. She thinks licking the stamp on the envelope of a Valentine is foreplay. - Milton Berle

Many marriages would be better if the husband and wife clearly understood that they are on the same side. - Zig Ziglar

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife. - Groucho Marx

The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!" - Red Skelton

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home. - Rodney Dangerfield

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

My wife and I tried two or three times in the last 40 years to have breakfast together, but it was so disagreeable we had to stop. - Winston Churchill

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to "the best woman a man ever had." The waiter joined me. - Rodney Dangerfield

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle


Chewie, We're Home

Police Rides

Bird Smoker

Hot Mexican Deals

Coffin Escape

African Airlines

Who Let The Dogs Out?

Autographed Copy

Fresh Air Computing

Porpoise Pilots

Sorry Employees

Sidecar

Middle East Play House

Cadillac Clearance

Don't Believe Everything You Read

Bee Prepared

Stolen Car

Paper Face

End Of The Line

Glass World - Where Plumbers Buy

Sheep in Wool Clothing

Admin Assistant Bird

Game's On

Backtracker Special