#1 humor site on the 'net

Deadneck Repairs

How not to extend service box electrical cables

Deadneck Repairs thanks to Wayne Nowazek

How Redneck electricians become one-time arc welders - extending a 3 phase electrical conductor that was cut too short

QuotaBills
Safety doesn't happen by accident. - Unknown

I invented the cordless extension cord. - Steven Wright

The greatest danger to our future is apathy. - Jane Goodall

With great power comes great electricity bill. - Unknown

Electricity is really just organized lightning. - George Carlin

There is always danger for those who are afraid. - George Bernard Shaw

Never was anything great achieved without danger. - Niccolo Machiavelli

Safety is a cheap and effective insurance policy. - Unknown

Style is a natural extension of who you are as a person. - Mark Richards

America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric. - Doug Hamwell

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

The chief danger in life is that you may take too many precautions. - Alfred Adler

My guitar is not a thing. It is an extension of myself. It is who I am. - Joan Jett

Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch. - Cathy Carlyle

Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush. - Phyllis Diller

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

The doctors can cure all sorts of ills, except the shock of doctors' bills. - Unknown

One cannot spend one's entire life running into bathrooms when danger calls! - Reif Larsen

If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel

Remember that the danger that is most to be feared is never the danger we are most afraid of. - Andrew Lang

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison. - WC Fields

A timid person is frightened before a danger, a coward during the time, and a courageous person afterward. - Jean Paul Richter

The danger of the past was that men became slaves. The danger of the future is that men may become robots. - Eric Fromm

How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter? - Woody Allen

If you are in the job for glamour, you're in for the shock of your life. The media is a huge shark pool. - Trisha Goddard

It's because you're scared that there's danger.
But could she manage not to be scared anymore? - Johanna Verweerd

Plenty of people who survive tragedies end up ambivalent about danger--frightened by it, yet strangely drawn to it. - Keith Ablow

I have written a book. This will come as quite a shock to some. They didn't think I could read, much less write. - George W. Bush

Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin

A man who has been in danger,
When he comes out of it forgets his fears,
And sometimes he forgets his promises. - Euripides

If this humor be the safety of our race, then it is due largely to the infusion into the American people of the Irish brain. - William Howard Taft

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

Faithfulness is essential to the character of a friend: without this there can be no safety in intimacy with and confidence in him. - Samuel Hopkins

One would be in less danger
From the wiles of the stranger,
If one’s own kin and kith
Were more fun to be with. - Ogden Nash

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Life can be magnificent and overwhelming - that is the whole tragedy. Without beauty, love, or danger it would almost be easy to live. - Albert Camus

When written in Chinese, the word "crisis" is composed of two characters. One represents danger, and the other represents opportunity. - John F Kennedy

The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark. - Michelangelo Buonarroti

And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected. - Spike Milligan


Owl And Batgirl

Sitting on the Hot Seat

Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Hawaii Surfing

Cloud Swing

Stork Exhaust

Napping Semis

Jigsaw Sudoku Puzzles B

Smoking In The Boy’s Room

High Tide Heels

Pen Utensils

SUV Sinkhole

Show Stopper

You Never Call

Not Going Outside Minions

Acoustic Hearing Aids

How To Spot A Rich Guy

Two Face

Angry Bird

Bach Scratching

Redneck Hotter Tub

Foot Wear

2fer Sudoku Puzzles G

Baby Shower