#1 humor site on the 'net

Smoking Cat

Trying to stop pets from smoking dropped cigarette butts

Smoking Cat thanks to Keith Blake

You gotta be kitten me. - Unknown

Curiosity killed the cat. - English Proverb

A meowing cat catches no mice. - Yiddish proverb

International Spade The Cat Week - Archie Bunker

Meow means "woof" in cat. - George Carlin

When the cat dies, the mice rejoice. - African saying

When the cat's away, the mice will play. - French Proverb

A cat bitten once by a snake dreads even rope. - Arab Proverb

Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics. - Fletcher Knebel

Love is an exploding cigar that you willingly smoke. - Lynda Barry

If you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast. - Woody Allen

I'd rather smoke crack than eat cheese from a tin. - Gwyneth Paltrow

I'm suffering a little bit from smoke exhilaration. - Archie Bunker

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life. - Faith Resnick

If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

The Wright Brothers flew through the smoke screen of impossibility. - Dorothea Brande

I have made it a rule never to smoke more than one cigar at a time. - Mark Twain

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

I phoned my Dad to tell him I had stopped smoking. He called me a quitter. - Steven Pearl

When rats infest the palace, a lame cat is better than the swiftest horse. - Chinese Proverb

I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something. - George Burns

When black cats prowl and pumpkins gleam,
May luck be yours on Halloween. - Unknown

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. - Rodney Dangerfield

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it. - Doug Larson

Without my Vulcan cat suit, Frankenstein wig and pointed ears, I don't get recognized. - Jolene Blalock

Always the cat remains a little beyond the limits we try to set for him in our blind folly. - Andre Norton

A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there. - Charles Darwin

Smoking kills. And if you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life. - Brooke Shields

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives. - Mark Twain

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

It was really strange to see all these apes standing around eating popcorn, smoking, wearing sunglasses. - Estella Warren

If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer. - Clement Freud

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

Mason took in enough cannabis smoke to allow a Lipan Apache manipulating a blanket over it to transmit the complete works of Tennyson. - Richard Condon

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

I definitely believe marijuana helps with menstruation. Since I started smoking pot, my girlfriend’s period has become painless for me. - Randy Kagan

I had fried octopus last night. You have to be really quiet when you eat it. Otherwise, it emits a cloud of black smoke and falls on the floor. - Steven Wright

When I hear of an 'equity' in a case like this, I am reminded of a blind man in a dark room - looking for a black cat - which isn't there. - Charles Bowen

Green Beards


Irish Sky Garden Crater

Irish Drink

Emotion Stew

Irish Rugby Fans

Daily Trivia D

Work Hard Philosophy

Irish Sunblock

Eat More Greens Diet

Leprechaun Treats

Irish Diplomacy

Irish Virgin

Irish Banister Blessing

Irish Alzheimer's

Bagpipe Runners

Irish Philosophy

St. Patrick's Pot of Gold

Irish Flu Shots

The Fert

Habby Sin Pad-Riggs Dey!

Hanging Out With Friends

Irish Birth Control

Philosophy of House Cleaning