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Snake Shortener

How snakes take care of loose ends

Snake Shortener thanks to Wayne Nowazek

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My own tax expert, H & R Crock. - Archie Bunker

Even snakes are afraid of snakes. - Steven Wright

No taxation without regimentation. - Archie Bunker

No taxation without representation. - Unknown

The current tax code is a daily mugging. - Ronald Reagan

You don't pay taxes - they take taxes. - Chris Rock

Taxation without representation is tyranny. - James Otis

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

A cat bitten once by a snake dreads even rope. - Arab Proverb

The power to tax involves the power to destroy. - John Marshall

Death and taxes are unsolved engineering problems. - Romana Machado

Government is an endless pursuit of new ways to tax. - Unknown

It's hotter than a snake's ass in a wagon rut. - Robin Williams

We don't pay taxes. Only the little people pay taxes. - Leona Helmsley

There is no income tax in Russia. But there's no income. - Will Rogers

The hardest thing in the world to understand is income taxes. - Albert Einstein

The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf. - Will Rogers

I think of lotteries as a tax on the mathematically challenged. - Roger Jones

I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. - Edith Sitwell

If Adam and Eve were alive today, they would probably sue the snake. - Bern Williams

In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes. - Benjamin Franklin

Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers

If you see a snake, just kill it - don't appoint a committee on snakes. - H. Ross Perot

Baseball is a skilled game. It's America's game - it, and high taxes. - Will Rogers

I wouldn't mind paying taxes if I knew they were going to a friendly country. - Dick Gregory

I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can't get killed by a blank? - Milton Berle

Taxes are the dues that we pay for the privilege of membership in an organized society. - Franklin D Roosevelt

Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is quite so satisfying as an income tax refund. - Unknown

I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy. - WC Fields

I'm proud to be paying taxes. The only thing is, I could be just as proud for half the money. - Arthur Godfrey

The wisdom of man never yet contrived a system of taxation that would operate with perfect equality. - Andrew Jackson

I could juggle anything in my day: balls, cigar boxes, knives. But I could never juggle my income tax. - WC Fields

Where there is an income tax, the just man will pay more and the unjust less on the same amount of income. - Plato

The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur C. Clarke

Isn't it a very curious thing that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland an' the English brought in the fleas. - Frank McCourt

To compel a man to subsidize with his taxes the propagation of ideas which he disbelieves and abhors is sinful and tyrannical. - Thomas Jefferson

On my income tax 1040 it says, "Check this box if you are blind." I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away. - Tom Lehrer

Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket, or a holding pattern over Philadelphia. - Judith Viorst

Indoors or out, no one relaxes in March, that month of wind and taxes;
The wind will presently disappear, the taxes last us all the year. - Ogden Nash

I see a good deal of talk from Washington about lowering taxes.
I hope they do get 'em lowered enough so people can afford to pay 'em. - Will Rogers


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