#1 humor site on the 'net

Aeroflot Announcement

Donald Trump starts love-in with Putin Inc.

Aeroflot Announcement thanks to Emery Pettigrove

QuotaBills
Talk is cheap... except when Congress does it. - Unknown

Don't risk more than you can afford to lose. - Joe Segal

I can't win. Love is Russian Roulette for me. - Freddie Mercury

I can't afford to die - I'd lose too much money. - George Burns

Russia is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. - Winston Churchill

You'd be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap. - Dolly Parton

Live in the sunshine
Swim in the sea
Drink the wild air - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Our Air Corps reunion was held to rememmorate the great things we done. - Archie Bunker

Something in the air this morning made me feel like flying... Spring Flight - Eileen Granfors

After I make a lot of money, I'll be able to afford running for office. - Christy Romano

If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova

The nation that secures control of the air will ultimately control the world. - Alexander Graham Bell

Not the cry, but the flight of a wild duck, leads the flock to fly and follow. - Chinese Proverb

A man is rich in proportion to the number of things he can afford to let alone. - Henry David Thoreau

If you don't know how great this country is, I know someone who does; Russia. - Robert Frost

There are two kind of air travel in the United States, first class and third world. - Bobby Slayton

It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

My twitter has become so powerful that I can actually make my enemies tell the truth. - Donald Trump

Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth, the air and you. - Langston Hughes

Make pumpkin bread as the default gift for everyone. It is cheap, it is beloved, it is carbs. - Karen Bender

I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap? - Phyllis Diller

I took lessons in bicycle riding. But I could only afford half of them. Now I can ride a unicycle. - Steven Wright

I want the pilot flying me up in the air at 30,000 feet to make more than a guy working at Taco Bell. - Michael Moore

I took a speed reading course and read "War and Peace" in twenty minutes. It involves Russia. - Woody Allen

The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage. - Mark Russell

The attention economy is not growing, which means we have to grab the attention that someone else has today. - Brent Leary

Give me my golf clubs, fresh air, and a beautiful partner, and you can keep my golf clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant - and let the air out of the tires. - Dorothy Parker

With the changing economy, no one has lifetime employment. But community colleges provide lifetime employability. - Barack Obama

When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it. - Henry Ford

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

With my old man I got no respect. I asked him, "How can I get my kite in the air?" He told me to run off a cliff. - Rodney Dangerfield

If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them. - Henry David Thoreau

Live in each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences of each. - Henry David Thoreau

Southwest Airlines is successful because the company understands it's a customer service company. It also happens to be an airline. - Harvey Mackay

We cannot afford not to live in the present. He is blessed over all mortals who loses no moment of the passing life in remembering the past. - Henry David Thoreau

A neurotic is a man who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is the man who lives in it. And a psychiatrist is a man who collects the rent. - Lord Webb-Johnson

A nation that destroys its soils destroys itself. Forests are the lungs of our land, purifying the air and giving fresh strength to our people. - Franklin D Roosevelt

Love is like jumping out of an airplane with no parachute. But there’s no need to be frightened, because that plane is still on the ground. - Jarod Kintz

Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list. - Yakov Smirnoff


Open For Business

Face Frost

Sleeping Guests

Garmin Drive

This Rocks

The Fall Of Adam

Canadian Archaeology

Unknown Assailant

Undergarment Financing

Shear Dog

Facebook Africa

John The Baptist Souvenirs

Tomato Treat

Evaluating Something

Cat Milk

Less Is More

Guitar Pool

Prehistoric Flash Drive

UniCorn

Puppy Circle

Wrong Planet

Scottish Weather Forecast

Chemical Solutions

Stealth Snake