#1 humor site on the 'net

Empty Bird Feeder

Squirrel reminder during a cold winter

Empty Bird Feeder thanks to Roy Taylor

QuotaBills
The early bird catches the worm. - English Proverb

Birds of a feather flock together. - English Proverb

Moose are the squirrels of Alaska. - Tim Moon

I want to paint the way a bird sings. - Claude Monet

The freedom of birds is an insult to me. - Cormac McCarthy

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. - English Proverb

Heavenly bodies are nests of invisible birds. - Dejan Stojanovic

A squirrel is just a rat with a cuter outfit. - Sarah J. Parker

The squirrel that you kill in jest, dies in earnest. - Henry David Thoreau

Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings. - Salvador Dali

The early bird gets the worm. The early worm gets eaten. - Norman Augustine

The bird is powered by its own life and by its motivation. - Abdul Kalam

I never wanted to weigh more heavily on a man than a bird. - Coco Chanel

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame. - Kohta Hirano

If one cannot catch the bird of paradise, better take a wet hen. - Nikita Krushchev

A bird in the hand is a certainty, but a bird in the bush may sing. - Bret Harte

The bird of paradise alights only upon the hand that does not grasp. - John Berry

Keep a green tree in your heart and perhaps a singing bird will come. - Chinese Proverb

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. - Steven Wright

The early bird would never catch the worm if the dumb worm slept late. - Milton Berle

In order to see birds it is necessary to become a part of the silence. - Robert Lynd

Though what bird in the best of circumstances does not look a little stricken? - Lorrie Moore

The structure of a play is always the story of how the birds come home to roost. - Arthur Miller

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer; it sings because it has a song. - Lou Holtz

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up. - Muhammad Ali

Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly. - Lanston Hughes

My husband, Fang, is so dumb I once said, "There's a dead bird." He looked up. - Phyllis Diller

Be grateful for luck. Pay the thunder no mind. Listen to the birds. And don't hate nobody. - Eubie Blake

Love is not only the story of butterflies or birds; it is also the story of jackals and hounds. - M.F. Moonzajer

I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm. - Franklin D Roosevelt

Just as the bird sings or the butterfly soars, because it is his natural characteristic, so the artist works. - Alma Gluck

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

The reason birds can fly and we can't is simply because they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings. - J.M. Barrie

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland

You are Mr. Owl. I am Ms. Hummingbird. We may come from different species but as long as you're a bird, I'm a bird too. - Glad Munaiseche

It's a good thing we have gravity or else when birds died they'd just stay right up there. Hunters would be all confused. - Steven Wright

The moment a little boy is concerned with which is a jay and which is a sparrow, he can no longer see the birds or hear them sing. - Eric Berne

A male frigate bird blows up a wild red pouch on his neck. He can keep it puffed up for hours. It is his way of impressing the girls. - Julie Murphy

If I were a flower,
humming bird would be my favourite bee
And If I were blind,
the light of darkness I'd love to see - Munia Khan


Clever Weather Billboard

Tree Huggers

Australian Construction Security

India Road Assistance

Cow Walking

Cultural Exchange

Meowzart

Bonus Baby

Strawberry Heart

Water Skiing in Russia

Plumber's Party

Hand Face

Moon Harvest

Reach For The High-Hanging Fruit

CheckMate

Ship Tow

Redneck Turkey Shoot

Costco Wine

Downer Parking

Baconurkey

Camel Herders of the 21st Century

Redneck Palm Pilot

Turkey Day Selfie

Spool Turkey