#1 humor site on the 'net

Law Frim

I've received a few cease and desist letters from this place

Law Frim thanks to Bill Wellbelove

QuotaBills
The trouble with law is lawyers. - Clarence Darrow

Whenever law ends, tyranny begins. - John Locke

Lawyers, I suppose, were children once. - Charles Lamb

Our ancestors ... were laborers, not lawyers. - Thomas Jefferson

Swift justice demands more than just swiftness. - Potter Stewart

Judge, could I, waddya call, encroach the bench? - Archie Bunker

Laws do not persuade just because they threaten. - Seneca

Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse. - Groucho Marx

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain

Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. - Martin Luther King Jr.

Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers. - Voltaire

The power of the lawyer is in the uncertainty of the law. - Jeremy Bentham

You're breakin' about 18 laws, maybe even a dozen. - Archie Bunker

Canada is the homeland of equality, justice and tolerance. - Kim Campbell

In the Halls of Justice, the only justice is in the halls. - Lenny Bruce

I've never been in love. I've always been a lawyer. - Unknown

The innkeeper loves the drunkard, but not for a son-in-law. - Yiddish Proverb

You shall judge a man by his foes as well as by his friends. - Joseph Conrad

Injustice is relatively easy to bear; what stings is justice. - H L Mencken

The sad duty of politics is to establish justice in a sinful world. - Reinhold Niebuhr

When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself. - Wayne W. Dyer

The husbands of very beautiful women belong to the criminal classes. - Oscar Wilde

The laws of probability - so true in general, so fallacious in particular. - Edward Gibbon

Life is nothing but a competition to be the criminal rather than the victim. - Bertrand Russell

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers. - Richard Pryor

Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant. - Robert Louis Stevenson

I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport. - Henny Youngman

I know that this defies the law of gravity, but, you see, I never studied law. - Bugs Bunny

A lawyer will do anything to win a case, sometimes he will even tell the truth. - Patrick Murray

Humour is based on a modicum of truth. Ever heard a joe-k about a father-in-law? - Dick Clark

Under the English legal system you are innocent until you are shown to be Irish. - Ted Whitehead

Ethics and equity and the principles of justice do not change with the calendar. - D.H. Lawrence

Even when laws have been written down, they ought not always to remain unaltered. - Aristotle

Justice is the insurance we have on our lives, and obedience is the premium we pay for it. - William Penn

My husband and I had our best sex during our divorce. It was like cheating on our lawyers. - Priscilla Lopez

Divorce = Rebirth: forget the past, replan your life, improve your appearance & rejuvenate! - Rossana Condoleo

Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet. - Mark Twain

Grammar, which knows how to lord it over kings, and with high hands makes them obey its laws. - Moliere

Disease is war with the laws of our being, and all war, as a great general has said, is hell. - Lewis G. Janes

Once in a lifetime the longed-for tidal wave of justice can rise up, and hope and history rhyme. - Seamus Heaney

I wanted to do something nice so I bought my mother-in-law a chair. Now they won't let me plug it in. - Henny Youngman

There are not enough jails, not enough policemen, not enough courts to enforce a law not supported by the people. - Hubert H Humphrey

When you say justice, it doesn't have to be war. Justice could just be clearing a path for people to dream properly. - Kanye West

I sometimes wish that people would put a little more emphasis upon the observance of the law than they do upon its enforcement. - Calvin Coolidge

Anyone who takes it on himself, on his own authority, to break a bad law, thereby authorizes everyone else to break the good ones. - Denis Diderot

Justice, sir, is the great interest of man on earth. It is the ligament which holds civilized beings and civilized nations together. - Daniel Webster

When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty. - Norm Crosby

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage. - Robert Anderson

Too many young folk have an addiction to superficial things and not enough conviction for substantial things like justice, truth and love. - Cornel West

The judge asked, "What do you plead?" I said, "Insanity, your honour, who in their right mind would park in the passing lane?" - Steven Wright


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