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Nice Try, China

Heavy Dtuy Wrench

Nice Try, China thanks to Wayne Nowazek

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A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

A clever man commits no minor blunders. - Goethe

Clever men are good, but they are not the best. - Thomas Carlyle

China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese. - Charles de Gaulle

Language exerts hidden power, like a moon on the tides. - Rita Mae Brown

I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27. - Clement Attlee

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - Lily Tomlin

Gossip is just news running ahead of itself in a red satin dress. - Liz Smith

The Republic of China - back in the Olympic Games for the first time. - David Coleman

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. - John Erskine

I personally think we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain. - Jane Wagner

First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin

We really have everything in common with America nowadays except, of course, language. - Oscar Wilde

A clever person turns great troubles into little ones and little ones into none at all. - Chinese proverb

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying. - Oscar Wilde

It is better to be making the news than taking it; to be an actor rather than a critic. - Winston Churchill

Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

When my friends and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker. - Robin Williams

Language is our meeting place, the sea we live in…it is the common ground of our humanity. - Toby Wolfe

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

The everyday kindness of the back roads more than makes up for the acts of greed in the headlines. - Charles Kuralt

I had a meal last night. I ordered everything in French - surprised everybody, it was a Chinese restaurant. - Tommy Cooper

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

Why don't you put that in the headline: "He Only Did Three With Doris!" Set a lot of people straight. - Rock Hudson

It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. - Jerry Seinfeld

If the English language made any sense, 'lackadaisical' would have something to do with a shortage of flowers. - Doug Larson

The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton

Morals are an acquirement - like music, like a foreign language, like piety, poker, paralysis - no man is born with them. - Mark Twain

When was the last time anybody saw us beating, let's say, China in a trade deal? They kill us. I beat China all the time. - Donald Trump

The wise man is but a clever infant, spelling letters from a hieroglyphical prophetic book, the lexicon of which lies in eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language?
One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap. - Red Skelton

Oil prices have fallen lately. We include this news for the benefit of gas stations, which otherwise wouldn't learn of it for six months. - Bill Tammeus

I'll love you, dear, I'll love you till China and Africa meet and the river jumps over the mountain and the salmon sing in the street. - W H Auden

NBC News just called it "The Great Freeze" - coldest weather in years. Is our country still spending money on the global warming hoax? - Donald Trump

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


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