#1 humor site on the 'net

Who Said That Women Can't Park?

Pre-flight preparation for Halloween

Who Said That Women Can't Park? thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Who Said That Women Can't Park? thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Who Said That Women Can't Park? thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
Women and elephants never forget. - Dorothy Parker

Woman was God's second mistake. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Well-behaved women never make history. - Maria Shriver

I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn

Put the light out, and all women are alike. - German Proverb

Halloween is an opportunity to be really creative. - Judy Gold

Women speak two languages, one of which is verbal. - Steve Rubenstein

He has a woman's name and wears makeup. How original. - Alice Cooper

My first day as a woman and I am already having hot flushes. - Robin Williams

There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works. - Will Rogers

Honesty is probably the sexiest thing a man can give to a woman. - Debra Messing

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age. - George Burns

She's loaded with this, waddya call, women's intermission. - Archie Bunker

A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he does not love her. - Oscar Wilde

Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him. - Groucho Marx

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. - Aristotle Onassis

I want to be a millionaire not for the money but for the woman I will become. - Jaime Tardy

He who has two women loses his soul. But he who has two homes loses his mind. - Ancient Proverb

When black cats prowl and pumpkins gleam,
May luck be yours on Halloween. - Unknown

Beauty is the first present nature gives to a woman and the first it takes away. - Fay Weldon

This woman was so cross-eyed. She can go to a tennis match and never move her head. - Phyllis Diller

Women over thirty are at their best, but men over thirty are too old to recognize it. - Jean-Paul Belmondo

The Book of Life begins with a man and woman in a garden, and it ends with Revelations. - Oscar Wilde

Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed. - Oscar Wilde

When a man has once loved a woman he will do anything for her except continue to love her. - Oscar Wilde

I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be made at me for saying that. - Mitch Hedberg

Feminism was established so as to allow unattractive women access to the mainstream of society. - Rush Limbaugh

One of the few articles of clothing that a man won't try to remove from a woman is an apron. - Marilyn Vos Savant

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. - Erica Jong

Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports. - Rita Rudner

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?" - Dumas

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. - Phyllis Diller

How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself. - Anais Nin

As a kid, you looked forward to Charlie Brown during Halloween and you looked forward to Monday Night Football. - Nick Ferguson

I see when men love women. They give them but a little of their lives. But women when they love give everything. - Oscar Wilde

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking. - Bill Vaughan

With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to "the best woman a man ever had." The waiter joined me. - Rodney Dangerfield

Perhaps women have always been in closer contact with reality than men: it would seem to be the just recompense for being deprived of idealism. - Germaine Greer

Never play cards with a man called Doc, never eat at a place called Mom's, and never sleep with a woman whose troubles are worse than your own. - Nelson Algren


Redneck Wiener Roast

Free Trip To Heaven

Is There a Hell For Animals?

Double Line Parking

Without Government

Nose For Coke

Crisp Chips

3 Stages Of A Man's Life

Tipsy Crane

Clear View

Redneck Ladder

Home Depot Delivery

Taco Bell Secret Seasoning

Are You OK?

Downchuck

Rickshaw Workout

Tenacity

Annual Meeting of Women Drivers

Bach Flip

Alien Smuggling

The Three Stooges In And Out Of Character

Teamwork

Sorry

Dunking Straw