#1 humor site on the 'net

Mexico Will Pay For The Wall

The Donald is supported by Mexican bricklayers

Mexico Will Pay For The Wall thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
Politics makes strange red-fellows. - Will Rogers

Crime does not pay as well as politics. - Alfred E. Newman

In politics an absurdity is not a handicap. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Political correctness is tyranny with manners. - Charlton Heston

Practical politics consists in ignoring facts. - Henry Brooks Adams

Turn on to politics, or politics will turn on you. - Ralph Nader

There can be no wise politics without thought beforehand. - Annie Besant

Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote. - George Jean Nathan

A government is the only known vessel that leaks from the top. - James Reston

Politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians. - Charles de Gaulle

Politics is the chloroform of the Irish people, or, rather the hashish. - Oliver St. John Gogarty

Every woman dreams of her own political career and her own place in life. - Raisa M. Gorbachev

Freedom of opinion can only exist when the government thinks itself secure. - Bertrand Russell

Democracy is when the indigent, and not the men of property, are the rulers. - Aristotle

My sheer existence is like a political act to a lot of people. It's not to me. - Grimes

Idealism is the noble toga that political gentlemen drape over their will to power. - Aldous Huxley

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. - Will Rogers

Most of us can read the writing on the wall; we just assume it's addressed to someone else. - Ivern Ball

I think it's an absolute disaster that Australia, the government, allowed kangaroo culling. - Steve Irwin

The difference between death and taxes is death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets. - Will Rogers

In a democracy, the one thing that cannot be done is to destroy its trust, its hope, its idealism. - Teresa Heinz

I confess I enjoy democracy immensely. It is incomparably idiotic, and hence incomparably amusing. - H L Mencken

The single most exciting thing you encounter in government is competence, because it's so rare. - Daniel P Moynihan

My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty. - Woody Allen

Such is the irresistible nature of truth that all it asks, and all it wants, is the liberty of appearing. - Thomas Paine

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip. - Caskie Stinnett

The irony of the matter is that the future generations do not have a vote. In effect, we hold their proxy. - Charles J Hitch

They say women talk too much. If you have worked in Congress you know that the filibuster was invented by men. - Clare Boothe Luce

One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors. - Plato

Taxpayer - someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination. - Ronald Reagan

Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin

One of the reasons people hate politics is that truth is rarely a politician's objective. Election and power are. - Cal Thomas

If the government was as afraid of disturbing the consumer as it is of disturbing business, this would be some democracy. - Kin Hubbard

Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book. - Ronald Reagan

The most dangerous person of the world is a member of the United States Congress just home from a three-day fact-finding trip. - Johnny Isakson

In Mexico, an air-conditioner is called a "politician" because it makes a lot of noise but doesn't work very well. - Len Deighton

I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn't lose any voters, okay? It's, like, incredible. - Donald Trump

These are stupid people that say, "Oh didn't Trump declare bankruptcy? Didn't he go bankrupt?" I didn't go bankrupt. - Donald Trump

I once said to my father, when I was a boy, 'Dad we need a third political party.' He said to me, 'I'll settle for a second.' - Ralph Nader


Costco Wine

Downer Parking

Baconurkey

Camel Herders of the 21st Century

Redneck Palm Pilot

Turkey Day Selfie

Spool Turkey

Meal Alert

Turkey Not

Thanksgiving Harvest Time

Turkey Wants You To Eat Pork

Going Cold Turkey

Bacon Turkey

Run, Turkey, Run

Biggest Turkeys

Turkish Architecture

Ghost Food

Turkey Weather Forecast

'Twas The Night Before Thanksgiving

Redneck Car Upgrade

Box Fill Overload

Hiding Horse

Traffic Jam Intersection

Re-Cycled Beef