Bear Praise

Survival kit for bears


Jack loved to hunt. Every winter he went out with his friends on the weekends looking for bear. One weekend, he couldn’t find a friend to go with, so he went out into the woods himself.

In the middle of a forest, he was taking a break when suddenly he was confronted by the largest, meanest looking bear he had ever seen. In his fear, all attempts to shoot the bear were unsuccessful.

Finally, he turned and ran as fast as he could in a vain attempt to outrun the bear. Jack ran and ran and ran, until he ended up at the edge of a very steep cliff. His hopes were dim.

Seeing no way out of his predicament, and with the bear closing in rather quickly, Jack got down on his knees, opened his arms, and exclaimed, “Dear Lord! Please give this bear some *religion*!”

The skies darkened and there was lightning in the air. Just a few feet short of Jack, the bear came to an abrupt stop, and glanced around, somewhat confused. He seemed to have become very calm and friendly...

Suddenly, the bear looked up into the sky, put his paws together, bent his head and said, “Thank you, Lord, for the food I am about to receive.”


QuotaBills
damn with faint praise - Alexander Pope

Support the right to arm bears. - Unknown

The best way to get praise is to die. - Italian Proverb

Survival is a major contributor to longevity. - Unknown

A puff of wind and popular praise weigh the same. - English Proverb

Humor is one of the best ingredients of survival. - Aung San Suu Kyi

People ask for criticism, but they only want praise. - W Somerset Maugham

No duty is more urgent than that of returning thanks. - St. Ambrose

I bear no grudges. I have a mind that retains nothing. - Bette Midler

A classic is a book which people praise and don't read. - Mark Twain

We come not to mourn our dead soldiers, but to praise them. - Francis A Walker

The measure of a man is the way he bears up under misfortune. - Plutarch

For all that has been - thanks.
For all that will be - yes. - Dag Hammarskjold

It has yet to be proven that intelligence has any survival value. - Arthur C. Clarke

Sandwich every bit of criticism between two heavy layers of praise. - Mary Kay Ash

Nothing happens to anybody which he is not fitted by nature to bear. - Marcus Aurelius

Most people would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism. - Unknown

I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

Thanks to this man I've gone from over-the-counter to over-the-barrel. - Unknown

The thinner the ice, the more anxious is everyone to see whether it will bear. - Josh Billins

Bulls and bears aren't responsible for as many stock losses as bum steers. - Olin Miller

It's not the bulls or the bears you need to avoid, it's the bum steers. - Chuck Hillis

To be blind is not miserable; not to be able to bear blindness, that is miserable. - John Milton

The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate. - Oprah Winfrey

Thanks you for being a part of my life, whether you were a Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime. - Unknown

Praise the Lord. Blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who finds great delight in his commands. - Bible

A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows. - Doug Larson

The ideal man bears the accidents of life with dignity and grace, making the best of circumstances. - Aristotle

You can't let praise or criticism get to you. It's a weakness to get caught up in either one. - John Wooden

Your majesty, I thank you from the bottom of my heart, and Madame Houde thanks you from her bottom too. - Camillein Houde

My favorite animal is a polar bear. They're going extinct, and I really don't want that to happen. - Quvenzhane Wallis

We are all motivated by a keen desire for praise, and the better a man is, the more he is inspired to glory. - Cicero

Drunk Man: "I can't bear fools."
Dorothy Parker: "Apparently your mother could." - Dorothy Parker

We deem those happy who, from the experience of life, have learned to bear its ills, without being overcome by them. - Juvenal

Even if my strength should fail, my daring will win me praise: in might enterprises even the will to succeed is enough. - Propertius

When we save the rain forest, the polar bear, and Al Gore, we should party so hard that Canada calls the cops on us for noise. - Paula Poundstone

Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. - I Thessalonians 5:16-18

When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me? - Bible

The chief ingredients in the composition of those qualities that gain esteem and praise, are good nature, truth, good sense, and good breeding. - Joseph Addison

If you think that nobility consists of having sixteen ancestors rather than merit, great Prince, then you may - and you may also praise or condemn me. - Franz Grillparzer


see also   Bear  &  Safety   Sections
Bear Pinata
Bear Print
Bear Protection
Canadian Food Chain
Canadian High Five
Golf Gimme
Grizzly Bear Chair
I Found A Bear Cub!
Russian Car Pool
Salmon Fight

 

Burning Water

Math Watch

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Elderly Rocker

Daddy, Can I Ride It?

Macklemore's grandad, Macklemost

Star Wars Howl

Swing Dad

Multi Task Dad

Twin Load

Sometimes Dads Are Wet For Work

Hospital Friends

Ways to say 'Dad' in Different Languages

Back Massage Track

Baby Sitting
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

16-Jun-2019