Bear Praise

Survival kit for bears


Jack loved to hunt. Every winter he went out with his friends on the weekends looking for bear. One weekend, he couldn’t find a friend to go with, so he went out into the woods himself.

In the middle of a forest, he was taking a break when suddenly he was confronted by the largest, meanest looking bear he had ever seen. In his fear, all attempts to shoot the bear were unsuccessful.

Finally, he turned and ran as fast as he could in a vain attempt to outrun the bear. Jack ran and ran and ran, until he ended up at the edge of a very steep cliff. His hopes were dim.

Seeing no way out of his predicament, and with the bear closing in rather quickly, Jack got down on his knees, opened his arms, and exclaimed, “Dear Lord! Please give this bear some *religion*!”

The skies darkened and there was lightning in the air. Just a few feet short of Jack, the bear came to an abrupt stop, and glanced around, somewhat confused. He seemed to have become very calm and friendly...

Suddenly, the bear looked up into the sky, put his paws together, bent his head and said, “Thank you, Lord, for the food I am about to receive.”


QuotaBills
damn with faint praise - Alexander Pope

Support the right to arm bears. - Unknown

The best way to get praise is to die. - Italian Proverb

Human kind cannot bear very much reality. - T S Eliot

In doing what we ought we deserve no praise. - St. Augustine

My parents put a live teddy bear in my crib. - Woody Allen

A puff of wind and popular praise weigh the same. - English Proverb

Humor is one of the best ingredients of survival. - Aung San Suu Kyi

Thanks, Darth Obvious. Or is it Emperor Palpable? - Chuck Wendig

Every survival kit should include a sense of humor. - Unknown

People ask for criticism, but they only want praise. - W Somerset Maugham

No duty is more urgent than that of returning thanks. - St. Ambrose

I bear no grudges. I have a mind that retains nothing. - Bette Midler

We come not to mourn our dead soldiers, but to praise them. - Francis A Walker

Praise is the only gift for which people are really grateful. - Marguerite

It is simpler and easier to flatter people than to praise them. - Jean Paul Richter

For all that has been - thanks.
For all that will be - yes. - Dag Hammarskjold

Sandwich every bit of criticism between two heavy layers of praise. - Mary Kay Ash

Nothing happens to anybody which he is not fitted by nature to bear. - Marcus Aurelius

Most people would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism. - Unknown

I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

Thanks to this man I've gone from over-the-counter to over-the-barrel. - Unknown

Bulls and bears aren't responsible for as many stock losses as bum steers. - Olin Miller

The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate. - Oprah Winfrey

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except for bears. Bears will kill you. - Unknown

Thanks you for being a part of my life, whether you were a Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime. - Unknown

Praise the Lord. Blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who finds great delight in his commands. - Bible

A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows. - Doug Larson

The ideal man bears the accidents of life with dignity and grace, making the best of circumstances. - Aristotle

A word of encouragement during failure is worth more than a dictionary of praise following success. - Unknown

Your majesty, I thank you from the bottom of my heart, and Madame Houde thanks you from her bottom too. - Camillein Houde

My favorite animal is a polar bear. They're going extinct, and I really don't want that to happen. - Quvenzhane Wallis

Drunk Man: "I can't bear fools."
Dorothy Parker: "Apparently your mother could." - Dorothy Parker

So long as men praise you, you can only be sure that you are not yet on your own true path but on someone else's. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Even if my strength should fail, my daring will win me praise: in might enterprises even the will to succeed is enough. - Propertius

When we save the rain forest, the polar bear, and Al Gore, we should party so hard that Canada calls the cops on us for noise. - Paula Poundstone

Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. - I Thessalonians 5:16-18

If you think that praise is due, now's the time to show it, 'cause a man can't read his tombstone when he's dead. - Unknown

When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me? - Bible

The chief ingredients in the composition of those qualities that gain esteem and praise, are good nature, truth, good sense, and good breeding. - Joseph Addison


see also   Bear  &  Safety   Sections
Bear Pinata
Bear Print
Bear Protection
Canadian Food Chain
Canadian High Five
Golf Gimme
Grizzly Bear Chair
I Found A Bear Cub!
Russian Car Pool
Salmon Fight

 

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19-Apr-2019