Secret Of A Long Marriage

Lessons learned on a Grand Canyon honeymoon


A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. Their domestic tranquility had long been the talk of the town. A local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret of their long and happy marriage.

“Well, it dates back to our honeymoon,” explained the man.

“We visited the Grand Canyon and took a trip down to the bottom of the canyon by pack mule. We hadn’t gone too far when my wife’s mule stumbled. My wife quietly said, “That’s once.”

We proceeded a little further and the mule stumbled again. Once more my wife quietly said, “That’s twice.” We hadn’t gone a half-mile when the mule stumbled the third time. My wife quietly removed a revolver from her pocket and shot the mule dead.

I started to protest over her treatment of the mule when she looked at me and quietly said, ‘That’s once.’ ”


QuotaBills
Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb

Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland

Deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance. - Oscar Wilde

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy. - Unknown

The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you. - Denzel Washington

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. - Ogden Nash

Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp

Falling in love and having a relationship are two different things. - Keanu Reeves

Real magic in relationships means an absence of judgment of others. - Wayne Dyer

Marriage is better than leprosy because it's easier to get rid of. - WC Fields

Marriage is too interesting an experiment to be tried only once or twice. - Eva Gabor

Marriage requires a special talent like acting. Monogamy requires genius. - Warren Beatty

I love romance. I'm a sucker for it. I love it so much. It's pathetic. - Drew Barrymore

Want to improve your relationships? See love as a verb rather than as a feeling. - Stephen R. Covey

Peppering your relationship with a dash of mystery can make it far more palatable. - Khang K. Nguyen

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. - Anne Taylor Fleming

Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx

I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck. - WC Fields

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. - Oscar Wilde

Love and respect are the most important aspects of parenting, and of all relationships. - Jodie Foster

A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby

Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship. - Buddha

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation. - Mark Twain

I have a great relationship with the blacks. I've always had a great relationship with the blacks. - Donald Trump

Romance is thinking about your significant other, when you are supposed to be thinking about something else. - Nicholas Sparks

The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. - Sam Kinison

Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum

Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang Goethe

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them. - Ogden Nash

Valentine's Day: Rubbing singles' noses in their lack of a mate and the noses of couples in their lack of time. - Emma McLaughlin

The quality of your life is determined by the quality of your relationships. The quality of your business is no different. - Harvey Mackay

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is. - Milton Berle


see also   Marriage,  Mule,  Newlywed  &  Relationship  Sections
A Woman Named Five Horses
A Woman’s Mind
Before Online Dating
Before The Impact
Everything Men Know About Women
Female Attraction
Flower Shop For Men
iGifts
Long, Happy Marriage
Looking For Your Wife?
Mission Gap - for Men & Women
Nagging Wife
Names of the Colours
Real Man’s Point System
Romance Lost
Secret of a Good Marriage
Understanding Women
When Men Shop For Groceries
Winning An Argument With A Woman

 

Wannabe Van

Biker Mailbox

Pet Dentist

Cell Phone Athlete

Happy Hour Bike Club

Transmission Line Parallel Bars

Bike Storage

Bowen Arrow

Friends In High Places

Skookumchuck Narrows Hike, Egmont

Ice Fishing in Wisconsin

Daily Trivia

Big Boots To Fill

African Sunset

Tonsil Ring
Submissions by Henry WiensFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

Voted #1 Humor Site

23-Apr-2017