“Excuse me, Sir.”
“Is that you again, Moses?”
“I’m afraid it is, sir.”
“What is it this time, Moses. More computer problems?”
“How did you guess?”
“I don’t have to guess, Moses. Remember?”
“Oh, yeah. I forgot.”
“Tell me what you want, Moses.”
“But you already know. Remember?”
“Moses!”
“Sorry, sir.”
“Well, go ahead, Moses. Spit it out!”
“Well, I have a question, sir. You know those “ten things” you sent me?”
“You mean the Commandments, Moses?”
“That’s it. I was wondering if they were important.”
“What do you mean “were important”, Moses? Of course, they’re important. Otherwise I
wouldn’t have sent them to you.”
“Well, sorry, but I lost them. I could say the dog ate them, but of course you would
see right through that.”
“What do you mean “you lost them”? Are you trying to tell me you didn’t save them,
Moses?”
“No, sir. I forgot.”
“You should always save, Moses.”
“Yeah, I know. You told me that before. I was going to, but I forgot. I did send them
to some people before I lost them though.”
“And did you hear back from any of them?”
“You already know I did.”
“What about the one guy who said he never uses “shalt not”? Can he change the words a
little bit?”
“Yes, Moses. As long as he doesn’t change the meaning.”
“And what about the guy who thought your stance was a little harsh and recommended
calling them the “Ten Suggestions”, or letting people pick one or two to try for a
while?”
“Moses, I’ll act like I didn’t hear that.”
“I think that means “no”. Well, what about the guy who said I was scamming him?”
“I think that is spamming, Moses.”
“Oh, yeah. I e-mailed him back and told him I don’t even eat that stuff, and I have
no idea how you can send it to someone through a computer.”
“And what he did say?”
“You know what he said. He used Your name in vain. You don’t think he might have sent
me one of those - er - plagues, and that’s the reason I lost those ten things, do
you know...”
“They’re called viruses, Moses.”
“Whatever! This computer stuff is just too much for me. Can we just go back to those
stone tablets? It was hard on my back taking them out and reading them each day, but I
never lost them.”
“We’ll do it the new way, Moses.”
“I was afraid you would say that, sir.”
“Moses, what did I tell you to do if you messed up?”
“You told me to hold up this rat and stretch it out toward the computer.”
“It’s a mouse, Moses. Mouse! Mouse! And did you do that?”
“No, I decided to try the technical support first. After all, who knows more about
this stuff than you, and I really like your hours. By the way, sir, did Noah have two of
these mice on the ark?”
“No, Moses.”
“One other thing. Why didn’t you name them frogs instead of mice, because didn’t you
tell me the thing they sit on is a pad?”
“I didn’t name them, Moses. Man did, and you can call yours a frog... if you want
to.”
“Oh, that explains it. Kind of like Adam, huh, sir? I bet some woman told him to call
it a mouse. After all, wasn’t it a woman who named one of the computers Apple?”
“Say good night, Moses.”
“Wait a minute, sir. I am stretching out the mouse, and it seems to be working. Yes,
a couple of the “ten things” have come back.”
“Which ones are they, Moses?”
“Let’s see. “Thou shalt not steal from any grave an image” and “Thou shalt not uncover thy neighbour’s wife.”
“Turn the computer off, Moses. I’m sending you another set of stone tablets . . .
”
see also
Religious Section
40 Years In The Desert - The Real Story
All Dogs Go To Heaven
Biblical Humour
Church Humour
Church Sign Generator
Church Sign Humour
Church Signs
Devil Sky
Garden of Eat’En
God Darts
If God Had Texted the 10 Commandments
Judas Asparagus
Moses As A Lifeguard
Moses’ Headache Relief
Moses’ Headache Relief - the Sequel
Moses Parting the Ice Field
Moses’ USB Tablets
Organ Donor
Original Homeland Security - 2nd Amendment
Prayer Conditioning
Prayer Request for Bob
Praying For Their Enemies in Edmonton?
Sundae Sermon
The Stoned Age & Judyism by College Students
Uplifting Church
Youth Pastor’s Last Speech
Voted #1 Humor Site
