Mental Patient’s Exit Exam

Exit exam based on simple math question


Three guys go through an exit interview at a mental hospital. The doctor says he can release them if they can answer the simple mathematical problem: “What is 8 times 5?”

The first patient says, “139.”
The second one says, “Wednesday.”
The third says, “What a stupid question. It’s obvious: The answer is 40.”

The doctor is delighted. He gives the third guy his release. As the man is leaving, the doctor asks how he came up with the correct answer so quickly.

“It was easy, Doc. I just divided Wednesday into 139.”


QuotaBills
Love is a grave mental disease. - Plato

Treat the patient, not the X-ray. - James M. Hunter

Caring is the essence of nursing. - Jean Watson

A patient man will ultimately succeed. - Unknown

Half this game is ninety percent mental. - Yogi Berra

Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer

Mental clarity ain't for the faint of heart. - Katerina Stoykova Klemer

My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

The doctor is often more to be feared than the disease. - French Proverb

Whether a person is a male or female, a nurse is a nurse. - Gary Veale

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

I am extraordinarily patient, provided I get my own way in the end. - Margaret Thatcher

Faith, to my mind, is a stiffening process, a sort of mental starch. - E.M. Forster

Confucius say: "Man who want pretty nurse, must be patient." - Unknown

Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness. - Richard Carlson

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

If you are patient in one moment of anger you will escape a hundred days of sorrow. - Chinese Proverb

I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for. - James H. Boren

You'll never have any mental muscle if you don't have any heavy stuff to pick up. - Diane Lane

Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman

Believe in the reasonable decency of the brethren; patients are not stolen — they run away. - Martin H. Fischer

Happiness doesn't depend on any external conditions, it is governed by our mental attitude. - Dale Carnegie

Some tortures are physical
And some are mental,
But the one that is both
is dental. - Ogden Nash

When you’re a nurse you know that every day you will touch a life or a life will touch yours. - Unknown

If the national mental illness of the United States is megalomania, that of Canada is paranoid schizophrenia. - Margaret Atwood

If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov

Having a positive mental attitude is asking how something can be done rather than saying it can't be done. - Bo Bennett

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

This yoga should be practiced with firm determination and perseverance, without any mental reservation or doubts. - Bhagavad Gita

Tooth decay was a perennial problem that meant a mouthful of silver for patients, and for dentists a pocketful of gold. - Claudia Wallis

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

The joy of surfing is so many things combined, from the physical exertion of it, to the challenge of it, to the mental side of the sport. - Kelly Slater

Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude. - Thomas Jefferson


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10-Dec-2016