It was Palm Sunday and, because of a sore throat, five-year-old Little Johnny stayed
home from Church with a sitter. When the family returned home, they were
carrying several palm branches.
Little Johnny asked what they were for.
“People held them over Jesus’ head as he walked by.”
“Wouldn’t you know it,” Little Johnny fumed, “The one
Sunday I don’t go, He shows up!”
Easter is never deserved. - Jan Karon
Jesus was a hiker. The wilderness was His retreat. - Toni Sorenson
There would be no Christmas if there was no Easter. - Gordon B. Hinckley
Jesus was a Jew, yes, but only on his mother's side. - Archie Bunker
Easter is very important to me, it's a second chance. - Reba McEntire
Those have a short Lent who owe money to be paid at Easter. - Benjamin Franklin
I'm Jewish, so I don't know much about Easter eggs. - Simon Kinberg
Easter is meant to be a symbol of hope, renewal, and new life. - Janine di Giovanni
My mom used to say that Greek Easter was later because then you get stuff cheaper. - Amy Sedaris
I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller
Do not abandon yourselves to despair. We are the Easter people and hallelujah is our song. - Pope John Paul II
Large, naked, raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who live in hutches awaiting Easter. - Fran Lebowitz
Ghosts have a way of misleading you; they can make your thoughts as heavy as branches after a storm. - Rebecca Maizel
Continuity gives us roots; change gives us branches, letting us stretch and grow and reach new heights. - Pauline R. Kezer
Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. - I Thessalonians 5:16-18
& Little Johnny Sections
After Easter Bunny
Blonde’s Meaning of Easter
Chocolate Easter Bunnies
Chocolate Easter Eggs
Did You Say Happy Easter?
Dying Pope’s Last Request
Easter Bunny’s Hare Spray
Easter Bunny’s Rude Awakening
Easter Bunny Wisdom
Easter Egg Drop-outs
Easter Elephant Eggs
Easter Identity Theft
Easter Sudoku Puzzle
Eggs with Eyes
Eggsellent Close Shave
Forgotten Easter Eggs
Happy Easter, Big Guy
How Easter Eggs Are Made
How Many Eggs?
Jerusalem Obituary, 33 A.D.
Leaving A Good Impression
Pine Trees Know When It’s Easter
Rabbit or Duck?
Taking No Chance with the Mother-In-Law
Texas Easter Bunny
The Rules of Chocolate
What’s In Easter?
Smoking In The Boy’s Room
High Tide Heels
You Never Call
Not Going Outside Minions
Acoustic Hearing Aids
How To Spot A Rich Guy
Redneck Hotter Tub