Mom Tested, Mom Approved

Rediscover your childhood!



Mom sits in baby's stroller seat

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Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw

Ignorance is the mother of admiration. - George Chapman

Fearlessness is the mother of reinvention. - Arianna Huffington

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover! - Homer Simpson

I'm not crazy. My mother had me tested. - Unknown

You trust your mother, but you cut the cards. - Unknown

An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy. - Spanish Proverb

The phrase working mother is redundant. - Jane Sellman

Necessity, who is the mother of our invention. - Plato

The best part of him ran down his mother's legs. - Jackie Gleason

Air pollution is turning Mother Nature prematurely gray. - Irv Kupcinet

Being a mother is an attitude, not a biological relation. - Robert A. Heinlein

His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork. - Mae West

Life began with waking up and loving my mother's face. - George Eliot

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law. - Hubert Humphrey

A man's mother is his misfortune, but his wife is his fault. - Walter Begehot

My mom always said normal is just a cycle on the washing machine. - Wynonna Judd

Cooking certain dishes, like roast pork, reminds me of my mother. - Maya Angelou

Adam was the luckiest man in the world - he had no mother-in-law. - Sholom Aleichem

If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? - George Carlin

A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but you mean your mother. - Unknown

I unapologetically and unabashedly am deeply biased toward my mother. - Chelsea Clinton

No one else, ever, will think you're great the way your mother does. - Mary Matalin

My religious background is that my mother is a Christian Dior Scientist. - Robin Williams

New mother - they get a sense of waddya call, "the maternals." - Archie Bunker

There's only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it. - English Proverb

Now, as always, the most automated appliance in a household is the mother. - Beverly Jones

The more I go through parenting, the more I say I owe my mother an apology. - Ray Romano

Necessity may be the mother of invention, but play is certainly the father. - Roger von Oech

My mother hated me. Once she took me to an orphanage and told me to mingle. - Phyllis Diller

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport. - Henny Youngman

A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary. - Dorothy Fisher

There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Mother love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible. - Marion C. Garretty

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

Your mother's down there throwing a monkey wrench into the halls of justice. - Archie Bunker

My mom used to say that Greek Easter was later because then you get stuff cheaper. - Amy Sedaris

My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee. - Phyllis Diller

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well. I was amazed - I never knew they worked. - Les Dawson

Enthusiasm is the mother of effort, and without it nothing great was ever achieved. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I not only think we tamper with Mother Nature, I think that Mother Nature wants us to. - Willard Gatlin

My mother-in-law has so many wrinkles, when she smiles she looks like a Venetian blind. - Les Dawson

The only place you’re sure to find love is at the end of a letter from your mother. - Bruce Lansky

You don't have to deserve your mother's love. You have to deserve your father's. - Robert Frost

My mother had this amazing attitude in the face of everything, including when she got cancer. - Bill Clinton

I realized when you look at your mother, you are looking at the purest love you will ever know. - Mitch Albom

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day. - Jay Leno

The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient, whilst Mother Nature takes care of the cure. - Voltaire

I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. - Monty Python Anb The Holy Grail

When I go home, I play with my baby dolls and strollers and diaper bags, and play with my sisters. - Dakota Fanning

Sayin' grace - it's just thankin' Mother Nature, whose 1st name just happens to be Grace. - Archie Bunker

They want people like your mother down there because they know they ain't got no pre-conscrewed ideas. - Archie Bunker

My mother always used to say, "The older you get, the better you get. Unless you're a banana." - Betty White

Drunk Man: "I can't bear fools."
Dorothy Parker: "Apparently your mother could." - Dorothy Parker

A mother takes twenty years to make a man of her boy, and another woman makes a fool of him in twenty minutes. - Robert Frost

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron

I love those hockey moms. You know what they say the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull is? Lipstick. - Sarah Palin

I am one of those cliff-hanging Catholics. I don't believe in God, but I do believe that Mary was his mother. - Martin Sheen

In Hollywood, you play a mom, and the next thing you know, you're on The Golden Girls. They age you so fast. - Gabrielle Union

To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power. Or the climbing, falling colors of a rainbow. - Maya Angelou

By embracing your mother wound as your yoga, you transform what has been a hindrance in your life into a teacher of the heart. - Phillip Moffitt

My mother was a reader, and she read to us. She read us Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde when I was six and my brother was eight. I never forgot it. - Stephen King

The rhythm of the footsteps, the sound of whatever is coming down the ladder is driving both me and my mom steadily toward peeing our pants. - Kendare Blake

Secretary: "It must be hard to lose your mother-in-law." WC Fields: "Yes it is, very hard. It's almost impossible." - WC Fields

Education commences on the mother's knee, and every word spoken within hearsay of little children tends toward the formation of character. - Hosea Ballou

I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Never play cards with a man called Doc, never eat at a place called Mom's, and never sleep with a woman whose troubles are worse than your own. - Nelson Algren


see also   Mechanical,  Mom  &  Safety   Sections
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Mom’s Survival Tips
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20-Apr-2018