If You’re Happy And You Know It

Musical background for clamping your hams



Clamp Your Hams

QuotaBills
Dinner is poured. - WC Fields

Pork is my friend. - Tom Douglas

Keep a clean kitchen - dine out. - Unknown

In Congress, it's all pork, all the time. - Jim Cooper

You can never put too much pork in your mouth. - Lewis Black

Ike runs the country, and I turn the pork chops. - Mamie Eisenhower

If you wish to grow thinner, diminish your dinner. - H.S. Leigh

I don't believe in dining on an empty stomach. - WC Fields

He that waits upon fortune is never sure of a dinner. - Benjamin Franklin

The food in Yugoslavia is fine if you like pork tartare. - Ed Begley Jr.

Out for lunch. If not back by five, out for dinner also. - Unknown

We're eating dinner soon. Don't fill up on homework. - Alex Baze

My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare. - Mike Myers

I'm kosher except for times where I eat pork and shellfish. - Roseanne Barr

I'm such a foodie. If I see a pork chop, I'm eating it. - Josh Henderson

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying. - Fran Lebowitz

If you call ham "Canadian bacon", what do you call bacon? - Michael Kelso

I'm carrying so much pork, I'm beginning to get trichinosis. - Phil Gramm

My metabolism stinks. I can gain weight just listening to dinner music. - Ron Dentinger

A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. - James Beard

After a good dinner one can forgive anybody, even one's own relations. - Oscar Wilde

Dinner and a movie? Forget that. I'd rather have a picnic and a waterfall. - Amanda Grace

When I was a kid, I used to think pork chops and karate chops were the same thing. - Shane Koyczan

I am guilty of asking the Senate for pork and proud of the Senate for giving it to me. - Ted Stevens

Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner. - James Bovard

I'm on a strict liquid diet: Mimosas for breakfast, Margaritas for lunch, Martinis for dinner. - Unknown

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. - George Carlin

I had a feeling once about mathematics – that I saw it all... but it was after dinner and I let it go. - Winston Churchill

When I invite a woman to dinner I expect her to look at my face.
That's the price she has to pay. - Groucho Marx

Nobody can fail to lose weight in the jungle, unless they've got a secret stash of pork pies somewhere. - Colin Baker

If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them missionaries for dinner. - H L Mencken

I'm into all that sappy stuff - a surprise picnic, nice dinner, or traveling. I'm kind of an old romantic. - Will Estes

Any processed chicken from any place - I'll order it in a heartbeat. I'm very picky about my pork, though. - David Chang

Because of their cuisine, Germans don't consider farting rude. They'd certainly be out of luck if they did. - P.J. O'Rourke

The pig is not just pork chops and bacon and ham to us. The pig is a co-laborer in this great land-healing ministry. - Joel Salatin

Poverty is an anomaly to rich people. It is very difficult to make out why people who want dinner do not ring the bell. - Walter Bagehot

I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner. - WC Fields

I'm Irish, so I'm used to odd stews. I can take it. Just throw a lot of carrots and onions in there and I'll call it dinner. - Liam Neeson

This is what I grew up on in Alsace. It's choucroute. I'd wake up every morning with the smell of cabbage and potatoes and pork. - Jean-Georges Vongerichten

He who cannot eat horsemeat need not do so. Let him eat pork. But he who cannot eat pork, let him eat horsemeat. It's simply a question of taste. - Nikita Khrushchev


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29-May-2017