joe-ks.com

Cowboy’s Gift From Revenue Canada
Revenue Canada handouts
Taking a chance with an auditor genie

A cowboy has spent many days crossing the desert without water. His horse has already died of thirst. He’s crawling through the sand, certain that he has breathed his last, when all of a sudden, he sees an object sticking out of the sand several yards ahead of him.

He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the sand, and discovers what looks to be an old brief case. He opens it and out pops a genie. But this is no ordinary genie. She is wearing a Revenue Canada ID badge and a dull gray dress. There’s a calculator in her pocketbook. She has a pencil tucked behind one ear.

“Well, cowboy,” says the genie. “You know how I work. You have three wishes.”

“I’m not falling for this,” says the cowboy. “I’m not going to trust a Revenue Canada auditor genie.”

“What do you have to lose? You’ve got no transportation, and it looks like you’re a goner anyway!”

The cowboy thinks about this for a minute, and decides that the genie is right. “OK, I wish I were in a lush oasis with plenty of food and drink.”
***POOF***
The cowboy finds himself in the most beautiful oasis he has ever seen. And he is surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies.

“OK, cowpoke, what’s your second wish.”
“My second wish is that I were rich beyond my wildest dreams.”
***POOF***
The man finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare gold coins and precious gems.

“OK, cowpuncher, you have just one more wish. Better make it a good one!”
After thinking for a few minutes, the man says, “I wish that no matter where I go, beautiful women will want and need me.”
***POOF***
He is turned into a tampon.

The moral of the story: If the government offers you anything, there’s going to be a string attached...




see also   Cowboy,  Genie  &  Government   Sections
40th Wedding Anniversary
Blonde Men
Bottomless Mug
Cinderella Joe-kette
Emu Order
Ostrich Genie

Adding special ingredients to the menu
Church Dinner
Doubles as a fishing boat with fins on the water
59 Chev Boat
Carrier pigeons that were faster than speeding bullets
Urgent World War I Message
Costa Concordia ship disguise to enter Canadian waters
An Iceberg Floated Into Town
The hazards of vertical electronic traffic lights
Walk Sign Timing
It's all in the hands...
Family Hands
Designer bed toppings for kids
Chocolate Bed
Walking into a feeding frenzy in the house
Crocodile Floor
Looks like the neighborhood is safe
Texas 911
Digital sign spells end of analog pedestrian
Walk Sign Ending
91 year old grandpa mowing his ditch banks
Mower Handle Extender
Taking a bite out of a scary trip to the Dentist
Dentist Waiting Room

Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

Voted #1 Humor Site

27-May-2012

QR Code

G'Oldies

Ritz Nursing Home
Soccer Sucks - Almost
2012 Rush Job Calendar
Plankstanders
Musical Throne
Gradiation
Redneck Math
Eddie the Eagle's Farew ...
Dual Fork Lift
Toilet Art
Bubba’s Shipping Inst ...
Aging Rock Music
Pregnant Belly Art
PARfect Golf
Mathematician’s Truck
'Let Us Pray' or 'Let U ...
USA Flight Formation
Elephant Enema
Carden Garden
Inspirational Quotes
Thirst Quencher Fridge
Dyslexic Camper
A. A. A. D. D.
Shoelusion
Redneck Water Taps
Guitar Farm
Granny Smith Apple
Fractured Foot or Hand?
Yuppie to Redneck in 25 ...
Blonde Snow Removal Par ...
Solitaire Survival
Irish Alzheimer's
Foot-Ball
Warm Bus Stop
Hillbilly Gas Chamber
Wife's Nightie
Too Much Homework?
Airbag Safety
New Rolling Stones Guit ...
Apple Art
Training Bike
Chain Gang Message 4U
Nine People - Can You F ...
Florida's Retired Biker ...
Bucket Bath
1907 to 2007: Century o ...
How Smart Is Your Right ...