Headline Stories

Lawyer one-upmanship - on himself

Has your sister been a pain this week?



Attorney accidentally sues himself
What goes around comes around...


We had no idea anyone was buried there!


Civil War Planes? Where did I put those history books...


Please - if you’ve seen this man...


And you wonder why...


Don’t you hate those DOE guys who do the NEPA’s EIS on
BNFL’s AMWTP at INEEL after SRA protests?


Only in America...


What are the odds of that?


The real reason for Government sub-prime
mortgage debt write-offs...


Winner of a local dog look-alike contest -
he does look exactly like his dog!


Just a friendly reminder...


Just when you thought it was around age 20...


When the Supreme Court has Noah idea what it’s talking about...


An artist’s conception of a football field after an electrical
transformer failure, knocking out the stadium lights...


“I wouldn’t do it again,” says the hero.
“She’s been a pain this week.”



QuotaBills
Make crime pay. Become a lawyer. - Will Rogers

Whenever law ends, tyranny begins. - John Locke

Don't judge your taco by its price. - Hunter S. Thompson

99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name. - Steven Wright

Don't judge folks by their relatives. - Unknown

A flagrant violation of international law. - Unknown

Law cannot persuade where it cannot punish. - Thomas Fuller

In law, nothing is certain but the expense. - Samuel Butler

Law and order are not necessarily partners. - Saying

Our ancestors ... were laborers, not lawyers. - Thomas Jefferson

I'm trusting in the Lord and a good lawyer. - Oliver North

It is not wisdom but authority that makes a law. - Thomas Hobbes

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain

Lawyers are men who hire out their words and anger. - Martial

The law must be stable, but it must not stand still. - Roscoe Pound

Lawyers believe a man is innocent until proven broke. - Robin Hall

Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers. - Voltaire

Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy. - Groucho Marx

Stop soft soapin' and trying to deterge the judge! - Archie Bunker

The power of the lawyer is in the uncertainty of the law. - Jeremy Bentham

If there were no bad people there would be no good lawyers. - Charles Dickens

You shall judge a man by his foes as well as by his friends. - Joseph Conrad

Don't judge me by my past. I don't live there anymore. - Unknown

A lawyer's opinion is worth nothing unless it is paid for. - Unknown

Who would give a law to lovers? Love is unto itself a higher law. - Boethius

I don't want to know what the law is, I want to know who the judge is. - Roy M. Cohn

It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes. - Sally Field

The only stable state is the one in which all men are equal before the law. - Aristotle

Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Lawyers are like beavers: They get in the middle of the stream and dam it up. - Donald Rumsfeld

A lawyer will do anything to win a case, sometimes he will even tell the truth. - Patrick Murray

Humour is based on a modicum of truth. Ever heard a joe-k about a father-in-law? - Dick Clark

A jury consists of twelve people who determine which client has the better lawyer. - Robert Frost

It is better to be a mouse in a cat's mouth than a man in a lawyer's hands. - Spanish Proverb

Canada is founded upon principles that recognize the supremacy of God and the rule of law. - Stockwell Day

Law enforcement cannot succeed without the sustained, and informed, interest of all citizens. - Lyndon B Johnson

The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges. - Anatole France

The law was made for one thing alone - for the exploitation of those who don't understand it. - Bertoit Brecht

The everyday kindness of the back roads more than makes up for the acts of greed in the headlines. - Charles Kuralt

In a litigation-happy society, clear agreements often prevent small disagreements form becoming big ones. - Harvey Mackay

The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer. - Will Rogers

What's the first excellence in a lawyer? Tautology. What's the second? Tautology. What's the third? Tautology. - Richard Steele

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted? - George Carlin

If we judge ourselves only by our aspirations and everyone else only their conduct we shall soon reach a very false conclusion. - Calvin Coolidge

In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. - John Adams

A nation that is afraid to let its people judge the truth and falsehood in an open market is a nation that is afraid of its people. - John F Kennedy

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. - Albert Einstein

Man has made 32 million laws since the Commandments were handed down to Moses on Mount Sinai... but he has never improved on God's law. - Cecil B. DeMille

The judge asked, "What do you plead?" I said, "Insanity, your honour, who in their right mind would park in the passing lane?" - Steven Wright

What we lawyers want to do is to substitute courts for carnage, dockets for rockets, briefs for bombs, warrants for warheads, mandates for missiles. - George Rhyne


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17-Aug-2018