Christmas Kittens

Santa's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker

A meowing cat catches no mice. - Yiddish proverb

All cats appear grey in the dark. - English Proverb

After dark, all cats are leopards. - Zuni Proverb

Meow means "woof" in cat. - George Carlin

When the cat dies, the mice rejoice. - African saying

When the cat's away, the mice will play. - French Proverb

A cat bitten once by a snake dreads even rope. - Arab Proverb

A girl with cotton stockings never sees a mouse. - American Proverb

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

In her elastic stockings, next to her very close veins. - Archie Bunker

The kind man feeds his cat before sitting down to dinner. - Hebrew Proverb

I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life. - Faith Resnick

If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat. - Ogden Nash

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere. - Groucho Marx

Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard

Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. - Rodney Dangerfield

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back. - Will Rogers

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man, but deteriorate the cat. - Mark Twain

Sleep is like my cat. I can call him by his name, but he still won't come to me. - Shane Koyczan

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

Without my Vulcan cat suit, Frankenstein wig and pointed ears, I don't get recognized. - Jolene Blalock

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

Always the cat remains a little beyond the limits we try to set for him in our blind folly. - Andre Norton

A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there. - Charles Darwin

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives. - Mark Twain

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

When I hear of an 'equity' in a case like this, I am reminded of a blind man in a dark room - looking for a black cat - which isn't there. - Charles Bowen