Hillary’s First Night As President

White House inspiration for the First Lady


[Hillary Clinton was sworn in today as President. She has disposed of Bill and is spending her first night alone in the White House. She has waited several years for this...]

FIRST NIGHT
Suddenly the ghost of George Washington appears to her...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Washington says, “Never tell a lie.”
“Ouch!” says Hillary, “I don’t know about that.”

SECOND NIGHT
The next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson appears...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Jefferson says, “Listen to the people.”
“Ohhh! I really don’t want to do that.”

THIRD NIGHT
On the third night, the ghost of Abe Lincoln appears...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Lincoln says, “Go to the theater.”


QuotaBills
Good government is good politics. - Richard J. Daley

There is no royal road to geometry. - Euclid

From politics, it was an easy step to silence. - Jane Austen

All government, of course, is against liberty. - H L Mencken

As our President said in his renegurial address. - Archie Bunker

Turn on to politics, or politics will turn on you. - Ralph Nader

The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun. - R Buckminster Fuller

There can be no wise politics without thought beforehand. - Annie Besant

The military don't start wars. Politicians start wars. - William Westmoreland

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

In my country we go to prison first and then become president. - Nelson Mandela

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. - Buck Henry

The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep. - George Stephanopolous

We have the best government in the world... that money can buy. - Mark Twain

Politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians. - Charles de Gaulle

It's a terrible shame that politics has become show business. - Sydney Pollack

History is a tool used by politicians to justify their intentions. - Ted Koppei

The sad duty of politics is to establish justice in a sinful world. - Reinhold Niebuhr

Every man who wants to be President is either an egomaniac or crazy. - Dwight D Eisenhower

Politics is the art of choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable. - John Kenneth Galbraith

Government can't give us anything without depriving us of something else. - Henry Hazlitt

Frankly, I don't mind not being President. I just mind that someone else is. - Edward Kennedy

The reason I'm running for President is because I can't be Bruce Springsteen. - Barack Obama

Hard men present hard choices - none more so than Vladimir Putin, the President of Russia. - Hillary Clinton

What is the first part of politics? Education. The second? Education. And the third? Education. - Jules Michelet

Good thing we've still got politics in Texas - finest form of free entertainment ever invented. - Molly Ivins

The single most exciting thing you encounter in government is competence, because it's so rare. - Daniel P Moynihan

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown

Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel. - John Quinton

Politics: Poli, a Latin word meaning "many"; and tics, meaning "bloodsucking creatures." - Robin Williams

I have certain rules I live by. My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. Nothing. Zero. - George Carlin

Being President is a lot like running a cemetery. You've got a lot of people under you and nobody's listening. - Bill Clinton

There are advantages to being President. The day after I was elected, I had my high school grades classified Top Secret. - Ronald Reagan

Everyone has a skeleton in their closet. The difference between Bill Clinton and myself is that he has a walk-in closet. - Pat Buchanan

Physicians and politicians resemble one another in this respect, that some defend the constitution and others destroy it. - Unknown

Did you hear about the auto worker who was offered a position as president of a bank but couldn't afford the pay cut? - Unknown

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies. - Groucho Marx

Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book. - Ronald Reagan

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth - something very difficult for a politician. Or watch your food - just watch it, don't eat it. - Edward I Kock


see also   Government,  History  &  Politics  Sections
Hillary in 2007:  Democrat Gift
Bill & Hillary in 2009:  Clinton Combo Kitchen Tool Set

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Bucket of Hillary
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23-Aug-2017