Hillary’s First Night As President

White House inspiration for the First Lady


[Hillary Clinton was sworn in today as President. She has disposed of Bill and is spending her first night alone in the White House. She has waited several years for this...]

FIRST NIGHT
Suddenly the ghost of George Washington appears to her...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Washington says, “Never tell a lie.”
“Ouch!” says Hillary, “I don’t know about that.”

SECOND NIGHT
The next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson appears...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Jefferson says, “Listen to the people.”
“Ohhh! I really don’t want to do that.”

THIRD NIGHT
On the third night, the ghost of Abe Lincoln appears...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Lincoln says, “Go to the theater.”


QuotaBills
Politics makes strange red-fellows. - Will Rogers

There is no gambling like politics. - Benjamin Disraeli

Politics have no relation to morals. - Niccolo Machiavelli

Man is not free unless government is limited. - Ronald Reagan

Politics is just show business for ugly people. - Jay Leno

As our President said in his renegurial address. - Archie Bunker

When I'm president, everyone gets a free pony. - Vermin Supreme

Turn on to politics, or politics will turn on you. - Ralph Nader

Politicians can't manage. All they can do is talk. - Donald Trump

What this country needs are more unemployed politicians. - Edward Langley

Government always finds a need for whatever money it gets. - Ronald Reagan

We live in a world in which politics has replaced philosophy. - Martin L. Gross

In my country we go to prison first and then become president. - Nelson Mandela

An honest man in politics shines more than he would elsewhere. - Mark Twain

We have the best government in the world... that money can buy. - Mark Twain

War has rules, mud wrestling has rules - politics has no rules. - Ross Perot

World War II was the last government program that really worked. - George Will

In order to become the master, the politician poses as the servant. - Charles de Gaulle

Every man who wants to be President is either an egomaniac or crazy. - Dwight D Eisenhower

Freedom of opinion can only exist when the government thinks itself secure. - Bertrand Russell

Politics is the art of choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable. - John Kenneth Galbraith

Government can't give us anything without depriving us of something else. - Henry Hazlitt

Frankly, I don't mind not being President. I just mind that someone else is. - Edward Kennedy

Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business. - Tom Robbins

Hard men present hard choices - none more so than Vladimir Putin, the President of Russia. - Hillary Clinton

My reading of history convinces me that most bad government results from too much government. - Thomas Jefferson

The single most exciting thing you encounter in government is competence, because it's so rare. - Daniel P Moynihan

Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel. - John Quinton

Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else. - Frederic Bastiat

When government accepts responsibility for people, then people no longer take responsibility for themselves. - George Pataki

It is a win-win for the American people, an idea no conventional politician would have the guts to put forward. - Donald Trump

I have a fantasy where Ted Turner is elected President but refuses because he doesn't want to give up power. - Arthur C. Clarke

Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you. - Pericles (430 B.C.)

Only government can take perfectly good paper, cover it with perfectly good ink and make the combination worthless. - Milton Friedman

There are advantages to being President. The day after I was elected, I had my high school grades classified Top Secret. - Ronald Reagan

If the government was as afraid of disturbing the consumer as it is of disturbing business, this would be some democracy. - Kin Hubbard

Very few of these panic-mongers have any personal knowledge of the countries that are already under blackshirt government. - Lord Rothermere

It is not in the nature of politics that the best men should be elected. The best men do not want to govern their fellowmen. - George MacDonald

Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage. - Ambrose Bierce

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan


see also   Government,  History  &  Politics  Sections
Hillary in 2007:  Democrat Gift
Bill & Hillary in 2009:  Clinton Combo Kitchen Tool Set

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24-May-2017