Husband of the Year

Ole shared everything with his wife - even his work



Wife pulling tiller in farm field while Husband stters it - Husband of the Year

QuotaBills
Take my wife - please! - Henny Youngman

I'm not aging, I'm marinating. - Unknown

Can you fix my husband? He says he's broke. - Unknown

Would a lion cheat on his wife? No, but a Tiger Would. - Unknown

A woman is attractive when she is somebody else's wife. - African Proverb

A man's home is his castle, and his wife is the janitor. - Lucille Kallen

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. - Milton Berle

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

I'm having trouble managing the mansion. What I need is a wife. - Ella Grasso

The man who says his wife can't take a joke, forgets that she took him. - Oscar Wilde

Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson

Obscenity is whatever happens to shock some elderly and ignorant magistrate. - Bertrand Russell

I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her. - Rodney Dangerfield

When my wife asked me to start a garden the first thing I dug up was an excuse. - Henny Youngman

All my wife wanted for Valentine's Day was a little card - American Express. - Milton Berle

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. - Sacha Guitry

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

Having a baby is like falling in love again, both with your husband and your child. - Tina Brown

I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming. - Jimmy Carter

My husband and I had our best sex during our divorce. It was like cheating on our lawyers. - Priscilla Lopez

If Hillary Clinton can't satisfy her husband what makes her think she can satisfy America. - Donald Trump

I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap? - Phyllis Diller

I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with 28 years ago. - Will Rogers

A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing. - Joey Adams

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love, though I'd stepped in it a few times. - Rita Rudner

Psychiatrist: a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free. - Unknown

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife. - Groucho Marx

A little House well fill'd, a little Field well till'd, and a little Wife well will'd, are great Riches. - Benjamin Franklin

Her capacity for family affection is extraordinary: when her third husband died, her hair turned quite gold from grief. - Oscar Wilde

Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home. - Rodney Dangerfield

I tell ya, my wife and I, we don't think alike. She donates money to the homeless, and I donate money to the topless. - Rodney Dangerfield

My wife simply quoted, 'For better or worse.' It was only then that I realized the phrase was not multiple-choice. - Michael Gurnow

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how to make it interesting. - Milton Berle

Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots. - Hoosier Farmer

I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch." - Phyllis Diller

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer

This is a honeydew day. That is when you get a day off and the wife says, "Honey, do this," and "Honey, do that" around the house. - Jim Lemon


see also   Marriage   Section
Badger Bale
Bucket Bath
Country SUV
Dutch Cowboy
Horse Follower
Husband Colors
Man of the Year Finalists
Once A Kid, Always A Kid
Redneck Bull-Only Carrier
Redneck Cadillac
Summer in Saskatchewan
Sunday Drive in the Country
Technology For Country Folk
Wife Of The Year
Will To Live

 

Computer Resuscitation

Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Gingerbread Star Wars Walker

Heathen Card

Christmas Pencil Sharpener

Cheaper Than Gas

Christmas Possessions To Enter Heaven

Becoming A Cop

Best Tea Cup

Titanic Size

Chevforodge

Nebraska Beer Cooler

Winter Hotrod

Russian Shot Glass

Eat Your Vegetables

Make My Daisy

Candy Canes

Ferrero Rocher Cupcakes

Scholar vs Dropout

Slug Strawberry
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15-Dec-2017