iGifts

Technology can get you in trouble



It all began with an iPhone. March was when my son
celebrated his 15th birthday, and I got him an iPhone.
He just loved it. Who wouldn’t?


I celebrated my birthday in July, and my wife made me
very happy when she bought me an iPad.


My daughter’s birthday was in August so
I got her an iPod Touch.


September came by, so for her birthday i got my wife an iRon.
iGifts iRon - technology can get you in trouble

It was around then that the fight started. What the wife
failed to recognize is that the iRon can be integrated into
the home network with the iWash, iCook and iClean.
(Warning: this inevitably activates the iNag reminder service)

I hope to be out of the hospital by Christmas...


QuotaBills
What do women want? - Sigmund Freud

Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb

A woman's work is never done - by men. - Unknown

Hell hath no fury like a woman's corns. - Archie Bunker

Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

A happy marriage is the union of two forgivers. - Ruth Bell Graham

Taking joy in life is a woman's best cosmetic. - Rosalind Russell

When a woman is openly bad she is then at her best. - Latin Proverb

A woman who strives to be like a man lacks ambition. - Unknown

All women are crazy, it's only a question of degree. - WC Fields

A weeping man and a smiling woman are not to be trusted. - Indian Proverb

I only take Viagra when I'm with more than one woman. - Jack Nicholson

Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another. - H L Mencken

Forgiveness is a gift of high value. Yet its cost is nothing. - Betty Smith

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

Irene Lorenzo, queen of the Women's Lubrication Movement. - Archie Bunker

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

Before you marry keep both eyes open; after marriage shut one. - Jamaican Proverb

He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of. - Mae West

Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. - Arthur C Clarke

Back then the women had babies, which they called in them days, begatten. - Archie Bunker

Women are like elephants to me: nice to look at, but I wouldn't want to own one. - WC Fields

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed. - Oscar Wilde

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is. - Helen Rowland

Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance. - Oscar Wilde

Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship. - Buddha

I do not think there is any silver bullet to solving the technology side of the security equation. - John W. Thompson

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. - Erica Jong

When I invite a woman to dinner I expect her to look at my face.
That's the price she has to pay. - Groucho Marx

A woman's dress should be like a barbed-wire fence: serving its purpose without obstructing the view. - Sophia Loren

We are each given a limitless capacity to love and attain wisdom. The extent we use these gifts is our choice. - Anthony Douglas

Marriage is like a beleaguered fortress: those who are outside want to get in, and those inside want to get out. - French Proverb

People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs. - Unknown

If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him... is he still wrong? - George Carlin

The greatest mistake we humans make in our relationships: we listen half, understand quarter, think zero, and react double. - Unknown

Can't figure women. Sometimes they're afraid of a spider, other times they're not afraid to stand right up to the devil. - Donal Harding

We live in a society exquisitely dependent on science and technology, in which hardly anyone knows anything about science and technology. - Carl Sagan

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking. - Bill Vaughan

Never play cards with a man called Doc, never eat at a place called Mom's, and never sleep with a woman whose troubles are worse than your own. - Nelson Algren


see also   Birthday,  Hospital,  Marriage,  Shopping  &  Stress  Sections
Before Online Dating
Before The Impact
Computing For Girls - A Windows Special
Everything Men Know About Women
Female Attraction
Female IT Experts
Hormone Guide
iPhone Dock
iPhone Evolution
iPottie
Iron Deposit
Mission Gap - for Men & Women
Mountain Iron Man
Names of the Colours
Real Iron Man Competition
Real Man’s Point System
Redneck Anniversary Gift
Secret Of A Long Marriage
Sheer Surprise
The Good Wife’s Guide
TurbAnne - India’s Iron Lady
When Men Shop For Groceries
Why iPad Won’t Replace a Newspaper
Winning An Argument With A Woman

 

Ex-Pilot

Stair Substitute

Alaska Phone Booth

How to Prepare a Man for His Funeral

Crap Flavoured Instant Noodles

Three Cats Ago

Burnt Out Driver

1-800-PILLCASH

2019 Hooters Owl & Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Bike Chaser

Bad Hair Day

Diehard Fans

Word Puzzle Clock

Skateboard Stairs

Quartz Inaccuracy
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

18-Jan-2019