Old Santa

Santa’s getting too old to be climbing down chimneys





Wishing you and yours a very Merry Christmas and a superb New Year!

QuotaBills
Santa's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker

I'm not aging, I'm marinating. - Unknown

A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown

I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. - Victor Borge

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

Forget aging. If you're six feet above ground, it's a good day. - Faith Hill

The key to successful aging is to pay as little attention to it as possible. - Judith Regan

Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard

Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. - Will Rogers

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball. - Doug Larson

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas. - Robert Kirby

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? - Unknown

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple


see also   Aging  &  Christmas  Sections
Christmas Balls
Christmas Dinner Made Easy
Christmas Fireplace Tip
Christmas Pencil Sharpener
Christmas Possessions To Enter Heaven
Forget The Present
Gingerbread Star Wars Walker
Heathen’s Greetings
Merry House
Office Party Grinch
Redneck Christmas Sleigh
Saskatchewan Entrepreneur
Save Santa The Trip
Signs of Christmas Everywhere
Texas Hood Ornament
Three Wise Men
Three Wise Women
Walking In A Doggie Wonderland

Mel Hardman (aka elvisweathercock)   Animations

 

Feeding Time

Rural Free Delivery

Urban Camper

Fractured Foot or Hand?

Yolkswagon

March of the Penguins - Canadian Version

Shoelusion

Almost Done

Swim Vacation

Foot Circle

Sumo Fault

Psychic Fair

Bread Dress

Cherry Picker

PMS Center

The Ass Family

Surf Lessons

Diet Water

Proof of Global Warming

Electricity Storage
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26-May-2018