Love Dress

How not to attract your spouse


A woman stopped by unannounced at her recently married son’s house. She rang the doorbell and walked in. She was shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked. Soft music was playing; the aroma of perfume filled the room.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“I’m waiting for my husband to come home from work,” the daughter-in-law answered.

“But you’re naked!” the mother-in-law exclaimed.

“This is my love dress,” the daughter-in-law explained.

“Love dress? But you’re naked!”

“My husband loves me to wear this dress,” she explained. “It excites him to no end. Every time he sees me in this dress, he instantly becomes romantic and ravages me for hours on end. He can’t get enough of me.”

The mother-in-law left. When she got home, she undressed, showered, put on her best perfume, dimmed the lights, put on a romantic CD and laid on the couch! Waiting for her husband to arrive. Finally her husband came home. He walked in and saw her laying there so provocatively.

“What are you doing?” he asked.
“This is my love dress,” she whispered, sensually.
“Needs ironing, what’s for dinner?”


QuotaBills
If you have love, it's easier. - Joe Segal

Those whom the gods love grow young. - Oscar Wilde

Love is not singular except in syllable. - Marvin Taylor

Hatred is never ended by hatred but by love. - Buddhist Saying

The best love affairs are those we never had. - Norman Lindsay

Afflicted by love's madness all are blind. - Sextus Propertius

Love is not what you say. Love is what you do. - Unknown

An old man in love is like a flower in winter. - Portuguese Proverb

True love begins when nothing is looked for in return. - Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Love shall be our token; love be yours and love be mine. - Christina Rossetti

Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another. - H L Mencken

Love is, or it ain't. Thin love ain't love at all. - Toni Morrison

Love is friendship set on fire. Hate is friendship burned. - Jeremy Taylor

My heart is small, like a love of buttons or black pepper. - S. Jane Sloat

Perfect love sometimes does not come until the first grandchild. - Welsh Proverb

Love is a canvas furnished by nature and embroidered by imagination. - Voltaire

Tenderness is greater proof of love than the most passionate of vows. - Marlene Dietrich

I love men, not because they are men, but because they are not women. - Queen Christina of Sweden

We shouldn't teach great books; we should teach a love of reading. - B.F. Skinner

Love puts the fun in together, the sad in apart, and the joy in a heart. - Unknown

So, fall asleep love, loved by me... for I know love, I am loved by thee. - Robert Browning

A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar. - Lao-Tzu

Well, at least he has found his true love - what a pity he can't marry himself. - Frank Sinatra

Love melts the rigor which the rocks have bred; a flint will break upon a feather bed. - John Cleveland

It isn't how much we do, but how much love we put into what we do that really counts. - Mother Teresa

The only place you’re sure to find love is at the end of a letter from your mother. - Bruce Lansky

Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit. - Bill Cosby

Love is not blind - it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less. - Julius Gordon

Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can't help but smile on it. - Josh Billings

Whoever loves much, performs much, and can accomplish much, and what is done in love is done well. - Vincent Van Gogh

Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd,
Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorned. - William Congreve

I love running. I’m not into marathons, but I am into avoiding problems at an accelerated rate. - Jarod Kintz

Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor. - Helen Rowland

I'd kiss a frog even if there was no promise of a Prince Charming popping out of it. I love frogs. - Cameron Diaz

I love these little people; and it is not a slight thing when they, who are so fresh from God, love us. - Charles Dickens

The fickleness of the women I love is only equalled by the infernal constancy of the women who love me. - George Bernard Shaw

If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, they're yours; if they don't, they never were. - Richard Bach

What's the earth with all its art, verse, music, worth -
Compared with love, found, gained, and kept? - Robert Browning

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. - Marianne Williamson

If I were a flower,
humming bird would be my favourite bee
And If I were blind,
the light of darkness I'd love to see - Munia Khan


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24-Apr-2019